Category Archives: Body image problems

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My secret to developing body awareness after losing weight

My secret to developing body awareness after losing weight

My secret to developing body awareness after losing weightAs I’ve described it earlier, my biggest struggle after losing 28kg/62lbs was what I’ve experienced after: when I looked into the mirror, the image of the body I saw staring back at me felt foreign. It felt like I was looking at an unknown person imitating my moves on the other side of the mirror. I felt like I’ve also lost all sensation of my physical body as if it wasn’t there. This phenomenon is referred to as phantom fat and it is basically the loss of your body awareness.

What is body awareness?

Body awareness can be defined as a perception of your body of how you feel it internally. In simple words it means that your mind memorises where your body parts are so you don’t need to look to find different parts of your body.

Some of the benefits of increased body awareness include:

  • the skill of self regulation: accepting the limitations of your body and adapting your movements and behavior
  • getting more out of the exercises that you do: you can feel when your form is off and you can make adjustments.

When you lose body awareness

Body awareness can be defined as a perception of your body of how you feel it internally.
She lost her body awareness. And her sanity.

What happened when I’ve lost 28kg/62lbs as my body transformed from 86kb/190lbs to 58kg/128lbs is that the boundaries of my body shrinked. Imagine living your life for years in an inflatable sumo costume and then suddenly you take the suit off. Your mind plays crazy games with you: avoid a chair to sit in because it has arms when in fact they don’t even touch you anymore; you ask people to move their chair so that you could fit in the row between them and they look weirdy at you because you already fit; you think that you can’t sit on the bench where the seat and the table are attached and then you fit; in the elevator you move closer to the corner to make place for one more person and you look silly because he already entered and there’s plenty of room. The list is endless and it just drives you crazy that your mind is playing tricks on you because it can’t sense the limits of your body.

Looking in the mirror tackles another kind of creepy feelings: you don’t recognize yourself. You see the reflected image, you know it must be you but it doesn’t feel like you. Or you walk past a shop and in the window you notice someone handsome and fit on the inside and you realize that what you’re seeing is your own reflection. These are the small things that drive you crazy when you lose body awareness.

So the next thing you must do is gain your body awareness back. I already shared some of my tips that can easily help you develop your body awareness after weight loss. See these 3 easy exercises to develop body awareness here>>>

My secret to developing body awareness: yoga

Body awareness can be defined as a perception of your body of how you feel it internally. Yoga is a discipline where specific bodily postures are practiced for health and relaxation. Yoga reintroduces you to your body and your body parts while strengthening your inner knowing and body awareness. I found that in yoga the body, the breath and the mind become a union. This union helps you develop self awareness and body awareness as well.

Just by doing a simple morning routine of 20 minutes of yoga will help you a great deal to become once again in tune with your mind and body.

I suggest you start with a simple morning sequence such as Sun Salutation. You can find a detailed instruction on how to do the Sun Salutation over at Yoga Journal.

If you get further into yoga, then you can try the advanced balance poses and back-bends. Those are really good for developing body awareness!

Or if you are a beginner, then sign up to a yoga class near you to experience the benefits of yoga and to help you develop your body awareness once again after losing weight!


Need more help seeing your new fit body image in the mirror? Get more tips by clicking here >>>

Can doing yoga help you accept your new body after weight loss?

The health benefits of doing yoga are endless: relaxes you and makes you focus, improves flexibility, builds muscle strength, perfects posture, increases blood flow, helps you sleep better, boosts immunity and so on. But can doing yoga help you deal with phantom fat after significant weight loss and help you accept your new fit body?

If you are following my blog, you are familiar with the issue that I had to tackle after losing significant weight: when I looked in the mirror, I saw a new fit body and I couldn’t relate to it. I had many other symptoms regarding of not being aware of my smaller body. Read more about my struggle with dealing with phantom fat here>>>

How can doing yoga help you accept your new body after weight loss

Yoga is not just a simple form of exercise. It is way more: it helps you develop a mind-body-soul connection. Your body can influence your mind. If you’ve taken a nice long walk in the park after a long stressful day to ease your mind and set yourself in a better mood, you know exactly what I’m talking about. On the other hand, your mind can influence your body as well: becoming embarrassed makes you blush in an instant. As social psychologist Amy Cuddy illustrated in her TED talk: just try one of the power poses – stand in a gladiator posture of confidence even when you don’t feel confident in order to improve your level of confidence immediately! This is a simple demonstration of how a certain body pose has an affect on your mind.

4 yoga exercises for accepting your new body after weight loss

Here is a list of yoga poses that helped me accept my new fit body after losing more than 26 kg / 57 lbs and having a hard time adjusting to my new fit body:

1. Tree Pose (Vrikshasana)

Can doing yoga help you accept your new body after weight loss? How: Start from standing straight and shift your weight to your left leg. The entire sole of the foot should remain in contact with the floor. Bend your right knee and bring your right foot on the left inner thigh.The hips should be open with the right knee pointing toward the right. Bring your hands in front of you in a praying position. If you feel comfortable, raise your hands clasped together above your head. Hold this position for 20 to 60 seconds, and then bring down your right leg and repeat on the other side.

Why it works: It improves balance, posture and concentration. Practicing this pose has positive benefits on overall balance and coordination.

Contraindications: Knee or hip injury.

2. Warrior 1 (Virabhadrasana I)

How: Stand straight and stretch up your arms, palms touching. Inhale and spread your legs sideways by creating a gap of 2/3 body height. Exhale and turn your trunk facing right while rotating your right foot to face forward and slightly rotate your left foot to the left. Bend your right knee for your thigh to become parallel with the ground. Now your head, chest and right knee and foot should face forward. Hold this pose for 5 breaths, and then repeat on the other side.

Can doing yoga help you accept your new body after weight loss?

Why it works: Helps you develop concentration, balance and achieve groundedness.

Contraindications: Hip, knee, back or shoulder injury.

3. Cobra pose (Bhujangasana)

Can doing yoga help you accept your new body after weight loss?How: Lay on the ground with your chest facing down. Keeping your palms and legs on the floor, lift your chest.

Why it works: It strengthens the spine and stretches your chest and stomach. It relieves stress and fatigue.

4. Bow pose (Dhanurasana)

Can doing yoga help you accept your new body after weight loss?How: Lay on the ground with your chest facing down. lie Grasp both of your feet with your hands to lift your legs and chest to form a bow. Remain in this position for some time, and try to swing back and forth or to the side.

Why it works: It opens up the chest, neck and shoulders. Has a beneficial effect on the whole body.


Need more help seeing your new fit body image in the mirror? Get more tips by clicking here >>>

Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe for fit body after weight loss

Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe for fit body after weight loss

Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe for fit body after weight lossThe Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe is suitable for anyone working a 9 to 5 office job (like myself) and for someone who likes to spend free time outdoors.

To see the steps of how to create a capsule wardrobe see my guide here.

The difference between dressing the fat self vs. fit body

The Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe for my fit body after weight loss is very different from the wardrobe I had while I was overweight. One thing that highly stands out is that my current capsule wardrobe is more sophisticated and minimalistic. Looking back to my old overweight wardrobe I can’t seem not to notice how the old wardrobe popped: bright colors, giant prints, cute details. It’s like I was trying to draw the attention away from my body and insecurities of being overweight by incorporating bright colors, unusual details and latest fashion trends. My overweight wardrobe looks like my fat self was screaming “Look at me! I’m pretty! I’m confident! Just look! Loooooook! I’m not a shy fat girl, no! I’m like everybody else! I’m better than everybody else!” Oh god. I’m so embarrassed for my old fat self right now.

My overweight wardrobe looks like my fat self was screaming “Look at me! I’m pretty! I’m confident! Just look! Loooooook! I’m not a shy fat girl, no! I’m like everybody else! I’m better than everybody else!”

My fat self thought that if I ever will lose weight and become fit that I will flaunt that hot body everyday and on every opportunity that I get. I imagined that I’ll dress like the celebs on the Playmate of the year gala. No, I don’t want that for myself, so I better not get fit, I’m better than that.

After losing weight and becoming fit I’ve discovered that it was fun for awhile to try revealing clothes at stores. I would try to wear it in public, but it just felt too much, even if it made me look stunning. You don’t get many occasions in your life where you need to look like a Playmate, and even if I did, turns out I didn’t want to look like a Playmate after all.

What is the difference between dressing the fat self vs. fit body? Fat body chooses a wardrobe with clothes that draw more attention whereas a fit body chooses a wardrobe with minimal and stylish clothes.

Get a look of my Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe

My happy little 24 piece Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe:

Winter 2015/2016 capsule wardrobe

The concept behind the Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe

My Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe has to fulfill the following expectations :

  • clothes that keep me warm during long walks
  • warm but not bulky looking clothes
  • clothes that last long
  • office friendly capsule wardrobe
  • professional polished look

I will wear the Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe throughout December, January and February (or even longer, depending on the weather). During the 3 months you are wearing your capsule wardrobe you are not allowed to buy any other clothing item. Planning your wardrobe ahead will help you spend less on clothes overall and you will be able to get higher quality items that will stand the test of time.

What my Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe  includes and misses

What my Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe  includes:

  • tops
  • bottoms
  • outerwear
  • shoes.

What Winter 2015/2016 Capsule Wardrobe does not include:

  • special occasion outfits (New Year’s Eve, Christmas)
  • workout wear
  • sleepwear
  • jewelry
  • underwear.

More capsule wardrobes for you to check out:

  1. Spring Capsule Wardrobe
  2. Summer Capsule Wardrobe
  3. Autumn capsule wardrobe

Need help planning a wardrobe for yourself after weight loss? Check out my guide! Click here to see it>>>

4 methods to help You deal with phantom fat

4 methods to help You deal with phantom fat

4 methods to help You deal with phantom fatPhantom fat is a condition that occurs after weight loss when you are unable to see your new fit body. Dealing with phantom fat can be challenging.

What is phantom fat?

If you used to be fat and you’ve lost significant weight recently, chances are that you are struggling with phantom fat. Phantom fat means that you still have the big fat body image in your mind even after you’ve lost weight and your body changed and became smaller. Your perception of yourself did not change: you still see yourself as fat, and you can’t relate to the fit body image that you see of yourself in the mirror.

More on phantom fat>>>

Good news: phantom fat is just a temporary state! Give it enough time, it will go away on its own. Your mind will become accustomed to your new fit and smaller body.

See how phantom fat can give you emotional struggles>>>

4 methods to help you deal with phantom fat

Here are 4 methods that will help you deal with phantom fat:

1. Ask a friend for a game of reflective listening

4 methods to help You deal with phantom fatSit down with a friend or someone from your family whom you trust. The game starts with you talking about you talking about your struggles of becoming fit but being unable to relate to your new fit body. Your friend needs to listen carefully to what you are saying, and they need to repeat what you said by expressing it with other words (aka paraphrasing your message). They should keep away from being judgmental or expressing their own opinion. They should concentrate on paraphrasing what you just said.

The aim of this game is for you to hear the message that you are saying for yourself in order for you to be able to find the underlying emotions.

If it is hard for your friend to phrase or grasp your emotions, you just have to keep on talking until they get it.

At the end of this game you will better understand yourself and your feelings regarding your phantom fat. By hearing back the underlying message that you send out by talking about your struggle with phantom fat gives you the opportunity to understand what you are going through. At the end of the game you will be able to develop insight about yourself.

2. Keep a journal

4 methods to help You deal with phantom fat
This will be my first post in my phantom fat journal

Start keeping a journal to analyze the development of your phantom fat over time. This is a way to write yourself out of the phantom fat phase of after weight loss struggles.

Writing a journal helps because basically your mind is stuck in the “I am still fat” phase while your body is in the “I am so fit” phase. So keeping a journal is a great way to give you insight into your thoughts and feelings. You can have a conversation with the part of your psyche that is still stuck in the past, aka fat phase. By writing a journal about your feelings and thoughts about phantom fat you will gain awareness that you didn’t have before.

3. Identify phantom fat

Knowing that what you are experiencing is phantom fat is the first step towards improving and overcoming your mental habit. If your thoughts revolve around your fat body image, chances are you struggle with phantom fat.

See if you suffer from phantom fat>>>

If your inner voice and thoughts say that you are still fat, even if others say that you look great and you’ve lost weight, then you might suffer from phantom fat.

Now listen to your inner voice: is it positive or negative? Why? Investigate the source of your inner voice. In case you notice a pattern while evaluating your inner voice, then trace the feelings back to your first memory about them.

Believe in yourself! Believe that you are fit! You know it, now believe that one day you will see it for yourself! If you believe, you are able to!

4. Self reflection

4 methods to help You deal with phantom fat
I am self reflecting, leave me alone. Let me just post this picture of myself on Instagram.

Sit down and think. Take some time for yourself, put aside an hour for yourself when no one will bother you. Grab a cup of tea, sit down in a corner and start thinking. Self reflect. Think about what you have learnt about yourself and your feelings of phantom fat so far. What did you accomplish so far that makes you happy? Don’t just list the obvious things like “I’ve lost 60 pounds.” but dig deeper: “I’ve adopted a healthy lifestyle.” Is there something that you regret that makes you sad? Time to identify that too.

Still haven’t found what you were looking for? Check out my other guide on how to accept your new fit body>>>

Found these tips useful and you want more? Click here to subscribe to my weekly newsletter>>>

Best exercises to get more in tune with your new body after losing weight

Losing weight will leave you out of sync with your body: you see a fit body when you look into the mirror, yet you can't relate to it. You are used to seeing yourself fat. See how these exercises can help you get more in tune with your new body after losing weight.

Best exercises to get more in tune with your new body after losing weightLosing weight might seem as a wonderful achievement, yet when your body changes so much that you go down a few sizes in clothes, some emotional issues may arise. The most common emotional issue after losing weight is phantom fat. Most people who used to be fat still have that fat body image in their minds even after their bodies have changed and they’ve become fit. The perception of yourself does not change that fast as your body does. This can lead to many problems in your everyday life, such as thinking that you are going crazy because people around you are telling you that you are fit when in your head you see yourself fat or standing on your tiptoes and sucking in your tummy to be able to fit in between the seats on the airplane when in fact you can move between the seats just fine.

Why are you out of sync with your body?

If you’ve lost significant amount of weight, then you might experience phantom fat. Your brain and your neurons can’t catch up to your new persona as your body has changed. The holistic approach sees this issue of disrupted body image being as a disorder in the energy field.  Your body has become smaller, and the energy field around it needs to adjust to it. This is a much slower process than the part of you losing weight and fat off your body.

3 exercises to get more in tune with your new body after losing weight

Luckily there are many exercises that you can do in order for you to get more in tune with your new fit body after losing weight. Here are the 3 best exercises to get more in tune with your new fit body after losing weight:

1. Slacklining

Best exercises to get more in tune with your new body after losing weightWhat is slacklining? Slacklining is an increasingly popular exercise in the balancing arts. It involves walking across a bouncy, highly-tensioned, single piece of webbing that is only a couple inches off the ground. Walking a slackline takes confidence a bit of practice.

Why does it work? Walking a slackline takes confidence and tremendous concentration. It takes focus of will to stand on the slackline without falling off. It is a great endurance training for postural muscles. Walking a slackline improves sensing your body as a whole so it helps to get the mental body image that you have of yourself in your head closer to the real body that you have after losing weight.

2. Yoga

Best exercises to get more in tune with your new body after losing weightWhat is yoga? Yoga is a form of exercise where the body, the breath and mind are seen as a union. It requires little or no equipment. Yoga soothes your soul while toning your body! Basically it is a system of postures and breathing techniques.

Why does it work? A regular yoga practice can help you heal your body image issues that you have after losing weight. Yoga allows you to pause and silence the mind, so you can observe your beliefs and habits and change the ones that are no longer helping you. It also eases your mind which is busy with negative thoughts.

3. Zumba

Best exercises to get more in tune with your new body after losing weightWhat is zumba? Zumba is an aerobic workout program that features movements which are inspired by various styles of Latin American dance. It is performed primarily to Latin American dance music,  but classes can also contain everything from jazz to African beats to country to hip-hop and pop. Zumba dance alternates fast and slow rhythms. It incorporates interval training and resistance training.

Why does it work? Zumba is a movement therapy. Just like dancing, it creates an internal appreciation for you own body. You learn to trust more to your body. The joy of moving your body makes you more in sync with the new fit body that you have and helps you let go of the fat mental image.

Need more help seeing your new fit body image in the mirror? Get more tips by clicking here >>>

Fit but can't see it: how to accept your new fit body

Fit but can’t see it: how to accept your new fit body

Losing significant amount of weight changes your body and your mind can't catch up to that change: this is why you see yourself fat when in reality you are fit. In your mind you are still fat, no matter what the scale or the image in your mirror shows.

Fit but can't see it: how to accept your new fit bodyThe body image disorder when you can’t see or can’t relate to the fit, smaller body that you have and you still feel that you are fat in your head is called phantom fat. Fat still exists in your mind. Find out if you have phantom fat here>>>

Phantom fat is a body image disorder when your mind is out of sync with your body. That’s why everyone is telling you that you are fit, but you still think that you are fat. Overcoming this false self perception might feel like an impossible obstacle. Especially when you feel like your mind is going crazy because you can’t connect to the fit body you worked so hard to achieve. Instead of giving up, I suggest rising above these crazy thoughts.

Here are 5 easy ways to overcome your body image disorder at home:

1. Dance

Fit but can't see it: how to accept your new fit body
If you feel like throwing some sand in your face when dancing, do it. Don’t hold back.

Dancing is a great way to keep your body and mind healthy. Dancing is basically a movement therapy because it creates an internal appreciation for you body. By moving around to the sound of music, you develop a greater trust of your body. This is exactly what you need when your mind and body get out of sync. Dancing is not only a great experience, it highers your coordination, balance, senses, flexibility and works your muscles. It also works the muscles that control your posture. Dancing is a great way to get in touch with your fit body after significant weight loss when you feel out of sync. It doesn’t matter what kind of a music or dance you choose, the important thing is to move your body.

The therapy: dance for an hour 3-4 times per week

2. Walk in the dark with closed eyes

Fit but can't see it: how to accept your new fit body
You can choose a safer place to take your walk in the dark. Or just walk in a tunnel.

In order to be able to walk with closed eyes, you will need to rely on your other senses in order to navigate. This will connect the mental image that you have of your body with the real life body you have. The secret of this simple exercise is that you will need to work with the body you currently have. You can’t walk in the dark with the image of the body that is imprinted in your subconscious! You’ll trip and fall, and bump into things! By walking in the dark with closed eyes you will see improvements in sensing your body as a whole

The therapy: Walk in the dark with your eyes closed for 10 minutes a day for 4 weeks.

3. Backward walking

Backward walking eliminates the typical heel-strike to the ground: it is the toe that touches the ground first. This might seem as a simple physical activity, but it requires a lot of brain activity as well on your side. Backward walking keeps you mentally sharp, puts your senses into overdrive, and enhances your vision. Backward walking is similar to the previous exercise (walking in the dark with closed eyes), however, you don’t need to close your eyes in this case.

The therapy: Walk backward for 10 minutes a day for five weeks.

4. Compare

Fit but can't see it: how to accept your new fit body
Yeah, her ass is clearly bigger than mine.

Phantom fat means that you can’t see a fit body when you look in the mirror, even when others tell you that you are fit. One way to work on accepting your new fit body image is to compare it to other bodies. You clearly see what body others have, you just have a problem accepting your own image as your own body. You can do 2 types of comparison:

The A) therapy: Check yourself in the mirror when there are other people around you. It doesn’t matter if it’s a big mirror at the gym or a huge window of a shop, just check yourself. Compare the fit body you see there (your own body) with other bodies in the mirror. You’ll be surprised at how you see yourself when comparing your body to others.

The B) therapy: Ask for comparison. Ask your friend or significant other to point out someone from a crowd who has a similar fit body composition as you. You’ll be surprised! Or ask them to show you a celebrity who has a similar body as you have! This is not only a great way for you to see your body for what it is, but seeing someone who is not you will help you rationalize your body size.

5. Positive self affirmations

Self affirmations can help you not just building up your self confidence, but also to see yourself in a better light. This is exactly what you need if you are suffering from phantom fat.

Fit but can't see it: how to accept your new fit body
Your aim is to love yourself like this old man loves himself.

Think of your body as another person. Describe it. Are you using constructive or destructive words when you describe your body? Are you criticizing any of your body parts?

Step away from negativity! Give yourself and your body the love that you deserve!

Now whenever you talk or thing about your body, turn those negative statements into positive ones! Enough of the negative self talk!

How to turn negative self talk into positive
Negative Positive
It's gross how my thighs touch when I stand with my feet together!  I am thankful for my thighs and what they can do for me! I can ride a horse perfectly!
My breasts are so small!  I love my jaw line!

Need more help seeing your new fit body image in the mirror? Get more tips by clicking here >>>

What do your friends think when they see that you are fat?

You are more likely to get an honest opinion from strangers about you being fat than from your friends. When I became fit my friends finally came clean and confessed to me what they really thought about me being fat. You'd never believe what your friends think about your weight!
What do your friends think when they see that you are fat?
“Should I lie to her and tell her she’s not fat? Eh, f*ck it, I’ll wipe that smile off her face by calling her fat”

How to get an honest opinion about you being fat from your friends? Lose weight, become fit – they will grab every opportunity to express how they think that you look awesome now that you’ve lost weight and that your are not fat anymore!

Wait – what? Does this mean that my friends think that I was ugly fat before?

Yes. Actually, no. Oh, it’s complicated, just like your relationship status.

What do your friends think when they see that you are fat?
“Oh my god, she is strangling me… with her big bones!”

Your friends’ honest opinion about your weight (if they find you overweight and fat) is something you will never know -until you become fit! The truth is that your friends’ opinion about you being fat is clouded by their feelings for you. If they feel that you have issues with your weight and are afraid of being called fat, they might just lie to your face about you looking awesome in those stretch pants, even when your muffin top is visibly spilling over just so that they don’t hurt your feelings. Making someone feel bad about themselves and calling them fat is not a thing you want to do to your friend. And bamm, a white lie is born:

“Noooo, you are not fat! You’re just big boned!”

How to tell your friends’ honest opinion about you being fat or not?

Test: You can go the easy route and ask your friend if they think that you are fat or not. Now that the bomb is dropped, pay close attention: study your friend’s face.

What do your friends think when they see that you are fat?
This is how an honest face looks like

He/she is lying: Is your friend looking like he or she is uncomfortable? Is her face twitching? If your answer is yes, congratulations! You just caught your friend lying! If your friend has an uncomfortable expression on her face, it means that she is uncomfortable with you asking that question if you are fat or not. She is afraid that she will hurt your feelings – hence she is telling you that she doesn’t think that you are fat. Now ask her:

– Ok, you don’t THINK that I am fat. But am I fat?

This is a way to uncover good liars: to ask the question twice. Now if they confess that they’d lied, congratulations! You just made them confess to you that you are fat!

He/she is telling the truth: Is your friend smiling? Is she relaxed? Chances are she is giving her honest opinion about your weight. If she thinks that you might take it hard to hear that you are fat, she might seem sad when telling you the obvious. A friend like that is a keeper. Someone who is not afraid to tell you the truth that you are fat, even if she thinks that she might hurt your feelings is an awesome friend. You should be proud of her, so don’t lash out on her. Even if hearing the truth that you’ve put on a lot of weight and you are fat is not what you’d want to hear. Be honest with yourself: deep down you know that you are fat. Time to put down those cupcakes and start exercising!

Friends vs true friends

There are two types of friends you will encounter while discussing your weight while you are being overweight (aka fat):

1. Friends

Friends who respect you for being comfortable with being fat

Friends whom you’ve managed to convince with your silent acceptance and grace that you accepted who you are. You accepted that you are fat, and you are fabulous!

What do your friends think when they see that you are fat?
“Let’s celebrate that you’ve accepted that you are fat! Bring out the balloons!”

These are the friends you like to surround yourself with, because they are boosting your self confidence and making you feel superior because you’ve managed to do what they didn’t: you’ve accepted yourself the way you are – you accepted that you are fat. Ironically, these are the friends that do you the most harm in the long run: they make you feel okay to be unhealthy fat. They make you stay in your comfort zone of being fat and being fabulous about it.

2. True friends

Friends who don’t understand why the hell you are so comfortable with being fat???

These friends are clueless about why you are carrying your fat ass with all that grace. How come you are so relaxed about being so fat? Being fat is not good for your health, so why are you so okay with being fat?

These friends can see through your charade: you did not manage to convince them that you’ve accepted who you are, that you are okay with being fat. You can’t be okay with being unhealthy! They see through you and you lying to yourself. And they don’t want to be part of that lie! You are hurting yourself with lying to yourself that you are not fat or that you are okay with being fat, and they know it. They love you enough to bring that to your attention in hopes that you would change your eating habits and lose all that fat. They are your guides to a healthier life!

If you want to change, then you should surround yourself more with these people! They will help your change, and they will give you the support you need throughout your weight loss journey!

What do you think your friends think of you? Share your opinion in the comments section below or follow my stories by subscribing to my newsletter. Click here>>>

From fat to fit girl secrets: 6 steps I did to lose 60 pounds

From fat to fit girl secrets: 6 steps I did to lose 60 pounds

From fat to fit girl secrets: 6 steps I did to lose 60 poundsWhen people who knew the fat me see the new, fit me, the second thing they ask (after “Christina, is that really you?”) is how I’ve lost weight. Here is my step by step guide for weight loss on how to get from fat to fit girl!

Step 1: Search for a low-impact exercise

The first thing you need to figure out is what type of an exercise will you enjoy doing. This is especially important if you’ve never ever did sports before and you couldn’t stick to any type of a physical activity in a long run, just like me. It took me long to figure this one out. I always considered myself the “chubby” one who isn’t a sporty type. I told myself that my body wasn’t build for a sport. I tried to commit to a sport, but I always failed. I knew I had to exercise, because exercise is good for your physical and mental health, and workout has other benefits as well. And I wanted to use exercise for weight loss.

From fat to fit girl secrets: 6 steps I did to lose 60 pounds
“Yeah… with my 190 lbs I’ll be able to do that… like never.”

While being obese, I started with occasionally going to aerobics classes: it was a disaster. I felt like my heart would jump out of my chest, I had breathing difficulties and shortness of breath, my joints hurt like hell. So I switched to total body workout, fat burning cardio, disco dance aerobics, latino dance, belly dance aerobic and other forms of cardiovascular exercises that I couldn’t keep up in the long run.

Finally I recognized that I have to choose a workout activity that fits the current state of my body.

That is while being obese my body can’t handle cardio – so I searched for a low-impact exercise. Initially I wanted to do yoga, but I felt like a big fat failure watching the yoga instructor and the other girls defying the laws of physics. Fortunately I stumbled upon a book about Pilates where they compared it to yoga. I immediately signed on a Pilates class and found that it was the perfect  low-impact workout that improved my flexibility, muscular strength and endurance. Exactly what I needed! From there with years of Pilates I’ve built up my body’s flexibility, strength and endurance to finally achieve my dream and start doing yoga.

So be prepared to experiment with different exercise activities until you find the one that suits your current body type and state of mind as well!

Step 2: Add to your workout routine an exercise activity that you enjoy

From fat to fit girl secrets: 6 steps I did to lose 60 poundsI knew that by only doing Pilates 2-3 times per week I would lose some weight but I wouldn’t achieve a significant weight loss. I wanted to speed things up, but I still wanted to have fun. So I started with coming up with exercise activities that I could do in my leisure time or with friends that were fun and that would provide me a workout. I wanted to exercise without even realizing it!

So I started rollerblading! Fun, fun, fun! Some of my friends also got roller blades, so we had fun times hanging out and having fun in the sun! I traded the rollerblading fun for ice skating during the winter months. It was the perfect activity for getting an exercise without even realizing it! Some of the fun activities you can try to incorporate into your active life are:

  • walking
  • hiking with friends
  • dancing
  • tossing a Frisbee
  • squash game
  • tennis
  • playing video games such as Wii Fit
  • using your bike more often

No need to take this exercise seriously – the aim of this is to have fun in order to change the meaning of exercise in your mind from it being something boring and a must-do to make you feel really excited about doing it.

On the other hand, there is the next step where we do exactly the opposite of this.

Step 3: Treat your workout like an important meeting you must attend

From fat to fit girl secrets: 6 steps I did to lose 60 poundsYou absolutely MUST attend your workout/meeting! You made an appointment and you can’t bail out! If unexpected things come up (e.g. a friend asks you if you want to grab a cup of coffee after work) you need to say no to that: doing your workout has high priority on your list! You wouldn’t miss a meeting with your boss to have a cup of coffee with your friend now would you? That’s exactly the attitude you need to have towards your workout.

This is the only way that you can make a workout a routine and be able to stick to it in a long run. For successful weight loss, you need to make a workout a habit. See how to develop a healthy habit here>>>

Step 4: Schedule your workout in advance

When planning your weekly schedule, plan a 2 hour window for your workout as well! If you are attending a group class for your weekly dose of exercise, plan at least 2 hours for your workout. I plan 2 hours because the classes are 1 hour long and I plan an additional hour for me to get there and back home from the group workout class.

From fat to fit girl secrets: 6 steps I did to lose 60 poundsAlways plan for the commute as well in your schedule! This might seem obvious, but it can save you a lot of unnecessary stress. Planning only 1 hour for a workout was a mistake I’ve kept repeating when I started working out regularly. This left me with being stressed out and always in a hurry to be at the next place. Relaxing at the end of a yoga class was impossible with me occupying my mind with the thought of running to meet with a friend or taking care of some other things. So don’t be like me: plan ahead so you can have a mind that can calmly concentrate on the present: the workout you are doing.

Step 5: Gradually increase the number of workouts per week

My biggest mistake when I started working out was that I either worked out for 4 days per week when I set my mind to it or I didn’t workout at all. I planned that I will start going to a Pilates class 3 times per week and exercise at home for the other 2 days. It was a nice plan. But in reality it went down like this: I went to a Pilates class on Monday; found a 30 minute intensive workout video on YouTube on Tuesday I tried; by Wednesday I had sore muscles and I was absolutely exhausted so I missed the Pilates class and stayed home laying on the couch doing nothing until the next week.

From fat to fit girl secrets: 6 steps I did to lose 60 pounds
“I’ll increase my workout to 25 hours of cycling per day!”

Instead of exercising 5 times per week I exercises 2 days and did nothing for 5 days and I’ve felt like a failure. I repeated this for months: switching up Pilates with other exercise activities and different YouTube videos. I thought that I was choosing an exercise out of my level of fitness – when in fact I was just starting with more that I could handle.

So if you’ve never exercised before for a longer period, then start with exercising 1 or 2 times per week for a few weeks. Then add one more day. So if you started by exercising for 2 days per week and you’ve kept it up successfully for 3 weeks, then add one more day by exercising 3 times per week. If you can keep it up for 3 weeks, than add one more day. You will exercise 4 times per week for a few weeks. Continue this until you reach the desired time of weekly exercise. For me the goal is to exercise 5 times a week for an hour.

It may take awhile for you to reach the desired amount of weekly exercise, but it is the only way to be able to do it while keeping it up in the long run. Take this advice and:

  1. You won’t feel like a failure for setting your goals way above your current level of fitness
  2. You’ll get use to your exercise schedule
  3. You’ll develop a sustainable workout routine
  4. You won’t be so exhausted that you would compromise your whole goal just to chill a little

Remember:

There is no magic, just a series of small steps.

Step 6: Change your eating habits one at a time

belly-2354_640Develop new habits or trade an existing bad eating habit with a healthy one. This is the only way for you to be able to keep it up in the long run. I cannot state the importance of changing one habit at a time – if you’ve missed this, read it here>>

Take one of the following bad eating habits and change it for a healthy one:

  1. Loving sweet drinks? No sweetened soda or sugary drinks for you! Drink water instead! If this is too vigorous for you, try switching canned soda or beverages for fresh fruit juices. If you managed to change your habit, then start by adding water to your fruit juice. Dilute your fruit juice by 50% with water. This is a great way to cut back on sugar and half the calories you intake from juices! The final step is to cut back on all juices and drink only water! Good luck!
  2. Overeating? Take up a healthy habit by eating until 80% full! Hara hachi bu is the Japanese term for eating until 80% full.The logic behind this is that your brain needs at about 20 minutes to register how much you have eaten. So stopping when you feel 80% full means you actually ate around 100% of what you can. So Hara hachi bu!
  3. Fan of snacks? No unhealthy snacks for you no more! Instead of reaching for chips or cookies, try eating fruits or nuts! Just watch out for the amount of the nuts you are eating, because nuts may contain a lot of calories! This means no chocolate, cookies or sweets for snack! Did you know that your cravings say a lot about you? So next time you crave chocolate eat nuts instead!
  4. Taking your coffee and tea with 2 spoons of sugar? Have unsweetened coffee and/or tea only! If you feel that coffee and tea without sugar tastes like bathwater, start by taking it with 1 spoon of sugar instead of 2 and then gradually decrease until you feel comfortable drinking your drink without sugar!

Interested in more tips on living a healthy life? Click here for my weekly updates>>>

I have been fat my whole life, do I have to stay fat forever?

I have been fat my whole life, do I have to stay fat forever?

I have a newsflash for you: you don't have to stay fat forever! I've been obese and overweight my whole life since childhood. I thought that I would have to live my life as fat forever. Don't be like the old me! Make healthy lifestyle changes and start living a healthy life today!

Fat childhood

I have been fat my whole life, do I have to stay fat forever?I come from a family of overweight people and I’ve been fat as long as I can remember. Obesity runs in my family so to say. So how come I still managed to lose pounds to become fit?

Well, there is no such thing as a fat gene. Being fat has to do with your lifestyle. If your parents are overweight, it means that they are eating more than they would need to eat. Chances are that they will feed you as a kid more than what you need for your age and activity level. And if you are a good kid, you will clear your plate.

So as a little kid, this becomes a standard for you. Eating a lot. Eating unhealthy stuff. A little exercise now and then, running around in the park or with your friends occasionally, and that’s it. You see your friends, and see that most of the kids are slimmer than you are. You look at your parents, you see they are fat just like you are. You look at skinny Jenny and her mom who is also skinny. You figure that you were born this way, fat is in your genes, you can do nothing about it. It is just the way you are.

You ask your parents if you are fat, they tell you that you are not fat, you are just big boned like they are. Look at your grandma, she is also big boned. Look at your cousin, he is also big. We are one big happy family. And being happy is what counts.

You figure that chocolate makes you happy, so eating a lot of it is a good thing.

This is how a fat child became an obese child.

Fat teen years

I have been fat my whole life, do I have to stay fat forever?
Look, her boobs are bigger than her belly! That’s not fair!

Puberty hits: insecurities about yourself emerge again! Oh my god! I am ugly! All the other girls are skinny, I want to be skinny! Amy has a lump on her chest, what is that? The boys seem to like it! Why don’t I have those lumps yet? The pretty girls in class are wearing tops that shows their belly buttons! They look like Britney Spears! I can’t wear a top like that. I tried one at home, but I look ridiculous. My tummy is bigger than my boobs. I cry and my mom asks me what’s wrong, so I confess. She tells me that I should not worry, my boobs will grow. But it’s not the outside that counts, it’s what’s on the inside. I know, and I know that I am sweet on the inside, and I am being nice to everyone. But when I am alone, I still want the skinny body, visible boobs and to rock the crop top.

So after years of not being one of the pretty girls but being one of the fat girls I finally except it. I have a nice personality. I am sweet, always smiling, I seem happy. I will never have a killer body, but I don’t care. I will certainly win over my prince charming with my personality. Princess Snow White won her prince over in ugly clothes with her pretty face and sweet personality. I have a cute face and sweet personality! I can do that.

I wish I had Snow White’s body frame…

Welcome to your fat 20s

Being fat in your 20s is interesting. You are used to being fat, because you’ve been fat your whole life. You seem to be comfortable being fat. To an outside observer it might be strange to see you being so comfortable and content with your weight and size.

The more time you spend being fat, the more comfortable you seem to be with being fat for the outside observer.

I have been fat my whole life, do I have to stay fat forever?
A quick snack before dinner on our date night

This is where it becomes hard being fat. You seem content and comfortable, and you feel like you’ve accepted yourself the way you are. And then your boyfriend right after the final breakup fight, when both of you are out of things to say, goes and breaks the silence by saying:

– Oh and you are ugly fat!

You don’t say anything, but inside you something gets broken. How can someone whom you’ve shared the last 3 years of your life and loved with all your heart call you fat at the end? Is this something he always thought of you? He wasn’t prince charming on a white horse! He was the white horse! Hearing that one sentence from a loved one shifts everything. You start to feel sorry for yourself.

I have been fat my whole life, do I have to stay fat forever?
A scene from my last breakup fight

You are sad because of the breakup. Things didn’t work out as you planned. You feel alone. You can’t sleep, you can’t eat. You barely eat at all. After weeks and weeks of sadness, it starts to show. You lose weight, fast. You are sad, but you are at least happy about your weight loss! You don’t even care that starving yourself is not healthy. You are losing weight!

Time passes, your heart heals, and it starts beating faster for another prince charming. Turns out he likes you too! Love and happiness! You are going out on dates again! You are enjoying yourself! You go out to fancy dinners, catch a movie. Then you go steady and eating out is replaced by ordering pizza and catching a movie at home. Weekend after weekend, and you can see that all that junk food and desserts are starting to show on both of you. You and your prince became round. But you don’t care! You are happy! You are in love! Who cares about you being fat again? Your prince doesn’t! He says he likes your curves just the way they are! Hooray!

The revelation that changed my fat life forever

As you approach to your 30s, you start to feel anxious. You are still casually dating or single, you still plan to get married one day (in the distant future), but something bothers you. You are experiencing some health issues: high blood sugar, lower back problems, leg and knee pain. When you complain about these health issues, your father tells you that you are just getting old:

– If you are over 30 years old, and after you wake up in the morning and nothing hurts, it means that you are dead.

You see your parents, who are old and are experiencing all these symptoms and many more. But you feel that there is something wrong. You look at other couples, who are the age of your parents and there seems to be nothing wrong with them. They might have some minor health issues, but they are completely different than your parents’ and they are work related illnesses. So you start to wonder: how can someone reach an old age and still be healthy? What is their secret?

Well, you are asking the right questions! When you study the lives of old people who look and feel young and compare it to your parents’ life you will see that the difference is lifestyle.

You always thought of obesity as a cosmetic issue. You never considered that being obese will have it’s effect on your health.

The secret to healthy old age is through a healthy lifestyle!

Yes, you’ve heard it before, and it sounds like a cliche. But have you ever evaluated your own life? To see what kind of a lifestyle you’ve been living! Well, I evaluated mine!

I have been fat my whole life, do I have to stay fat forever?
I have a new healthy life!

I saw that if I continue to live the way I lived I will end up just like my parents: with various health problems. I saw my future. Seeing my mom deal with migraines, seeing my dad having heart problems made me feel helpless. I wanted to help them, but I couldn’t. Seeing your loved ones in pain is hard. You want to help them, but you don’t know what to do when even doctors can’t help them.

I flashed forward and I saw myself in them. I saw how my future kid will once stand by my side watch me having a migraine and just stand there and feel helpless just the way as I am feeling. This is the best case scenario. I don’t have kids, and I’m getting near my 30s. I’ll be way older than my parents by the time my kid grows into an adult. He or she will have to see me suffer even harder, and with more health issues.

This scared the sh!t out of me. I don’t want my unborn child to live through the horror of seeing old and unhealthy parents at a young age!

So what can I do about this? I can start by changing my unhealthy lifestyle to a healthy one!

Fit 30s and counting!

So I started with small steps: changing one bad habit for a healthy one. Starting to exercise and searching for the right type of exercise that will fit me. Changing my diet plan by eating more vegetables and fruits. Finding ways to manage stress by doing yoga and bringing more balance to my life. I’ve seen improvement in the quality of my life gradually. The health issues disappeared, I felt better than ever before, I’ve lost weight and I started to look better than the Disney princesses! I am over 30, and I’ve never been this fit in my life!

Could this be your story? Join me and other girls who went from fat to fit on Facebook>>>

How to go from fat to fit girl – find out in next weeks blog post on Tuesday!

How to deal with fear of getting fat again while being fit

How to deal with fear of getting fat again while being fit

Are you afraid of getting fat again? Learn to live without the fear of getting fat again.

How to deal with fear of getting fat again while being fitTrading an unhealthy lifestyle for a healthy one. Finding time for exercise. Starting exercising regularly. Making eating healthy and leading an active life a top priority. Seeing result. Small scale victory. Introducing a new type of exercise. Adjusting your meals and meal proportions. Giving up chocolate. Losing fat on your hips. Needing smaller clothes. Redefining your whole wardrobe to fit your smaller body. Going to the gym for the first time. Buying the first quality gym clothes. Wearing it to workout instead of those ratty old sweat pants. People complementing you on how you’ve lost weight. You being able to see your new fit body in the mirror. It’s a long journey, it doesn’t happen in a week, it takes time, dedication. And then starting to obsess over getting fat again.

Being afraid of becoming fat again will be one of the issues you will need to address after you lose significant weight and become fit.

The reasons behind being afraid of becoming fat again

First of all, you will need to identify why is  it that you feel like you need to be afraid of getting fat again. Take your time to think about why you are afraid of becoming fat again. Think hard, dig deep. Be honest with yourself about why you are afraid of becoming fat again!

Are you afraid of becoming fat again because you:

#1. Skipped regular  workouts for weeks?

#2. Started eating more junk food and/or sweets?

#3. Scale is showing weight gain?

#4. None of the above!

Now that you’ve identified of why you are afraid of getting fat again you will need to address that fear. Find the reason below and read the tips on how to live without the fear of getting fat again.


7 tips to live without the fear of getting fat again

Choose one of the 4 reasons listed above for you being afraid of becoming fat again, and read on to see how to address that issue efficiently.

Reason #1: Skipped regular  workouts for weeks

You have guilty conscience because you’ve skipped workouts. The fear of becoming fat again is your conscience telling you that you’ve fallen off the right tracks you were on. This is actually a good thing, meaning that your body and mind cares about your health. It is warning you that you need to get back to your active lifestyle.

a.) In case of being lazy or life interfering

In order to silence your conscience, you will need to start exercising again. If you’ve had a longer break, then introduce yourself to exercising slowly. Start by exercising 2 times per week, and then gradually increase that, until you reach the desired number of times and hours per week you were satisfied with.

>>>How to restart workout routine

b.) In case of injury or sickness

In case you have an injury or are unable to workout for a longer period of time, see this guide to help you maintain your weight and gains>>>

>>>How not to freak out about losing workout routine while injured or sick


Reason #2: Started eating more junk food and/or sweets

See why is it that you have the need to eat more junk food or sweets?

a.) In case you’re easing an emotional situation with eating

How to deal with fear of getting fat again while being fitLooking back I see that one of the reasons I became obese was because of how I handled stress. Every time I faced stress, I ate. Sometimes I ate anything I could put my hands on: chocolate, biscuits, leftovers from the fridge. You name anything, if I was stressed, I ate it.

Eating to ease stress or sadness is a coping mechanism. After you eat, the parasympathetic nervous system gets active when your body hits the “rest and digest” state. Basically you fall into rest mode. So it makes it a perfect subject for misusing this system. Feeling anxious? Stressed? Sad? EAT! Whoah, I feel calm and comforted now.

Solution: Find another way to cope with stress. I started doing yoga and meditating for 20 minutes per day, but you can use anything that helps you handle stress (unless it’s eating junk food and sweets).

b.) In case you’re eating more because you are hungry

In this case you need to examine your hunger. One of the reasons might be that you are starving yourself and your body needs more food and that’s why you are feeling hungry. Maybe the number of calories you calculated that you need to eat are not enough: it depends on your activity level as well. So if you are doing more vigorous exercise such as weight training, you will need to eat more. Just make it a healthy foods, with the right amount of protein/fats/carbs. And most importantly:

Eat until 80% full.

The other reason behind eating more may be that your meals are not balanced out throughout the day. I used to hardly eat during the day while at the office, so naturally I became really hungry once I got home. So I ate my lunch/supper, dessert, chocolate, fruits, nuts, ice cream, cheese. I ate my supper at the table, and then walked back and forth towards the fridge eating until I felt full. Introducing in-between healthy snacks (such as fruits or veggies) while in the office helped me balance out my meals throughout the day. So I’m not feeling hungry anymore and are eating the needed amount of calories for my body and activity level.


Reason #3: Scale is showing weight gain

Stepping on the scale to check your weight and see weight gain might freak you out and make you think that you’ll become fat again. However, this is not so simple. Read on.

a.) In case weighting yourself occasionally

How to deal with fear of getting fat again while being fitStepping on the scale occasionally is fine because it can help you keep yourself on track. You’ll notice a major weight gain while it is happening and you’ll be able to interfere.

However, pay attention to the fact that muscle is heavier than fat. So maybe you are experiencing what I was: gaining muscle and losing fat meaning that the number on the scale goes up. However, if you look at yourself, you can clearly see that it’s not fat that you are gaining, it’s muscle. So if you suddenly have visible biceps without flexing or bubble booty, then the weight gain a sign of you gaining muscles!

b.) In case you are weighting yourself daily

Stop. Just stop weighting yourself every day. It’s not healthy to obsess over your weight. Instead focus on the weight of your dumbbells going up instead of focusing on the numbers of your scale going down. Remember, daily fluctuations in weight don’t mean a thing. So you might as well stop obsessing over the numbers on that scale.


 

Reason #4: None of the above

If your reason of being afraid of becoming fat again is none of the reasons addressed above, then it means that you have some issues you need to deal with.

Losing weight is not easy. Keeping it off in the long run is harder. It needs discipline and developing healthy habits. After becoming fit you will certainly go through a phase where you are afraid of becoming fat again, and it is okay. You can use this fear to motivate you, to fuel your workout or healthy habits. However, you must pay close attention to that fear of getting fat again, because it can lead you down the dark path of obsession over your weight.


Interested in more tips on living a healthy life? Click here for my weekly updates>>>