Tag Archives: body image struggle

How to accept fit body after weight loss

Having fit body but being unable to see it: how to accept new fit body

How to accept fit body after weight lossRemember how I’ve had problems dealing with phantom fat in the past? I struggled with accepting my smaller fit body after being obese and fat most of my life.

After losing weight and becoming fit the issue that I am struggling with is similar to seeing a fat self image instead of a new fit body. The problem I am having is that I can’t see the muscles and my body for what it is. After losing significant weight and becoming fit I started weightlifting because I was losing more muscle than fat. So I figured that weightlifting is a way to go to improve my new fit body. Plus, I’ve read awesome things about the benefits of weightlifting for a woman, so I had to give it a try.

How to address the emotional side of not being able to see your new fit body for what it is

How to accept fit body after losing weightAs it feels awesome to be able to carry my own groceries, it feels strange to look in the mirror at the gym to see muscles on my body where there used to be fat. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have manly muscles, because a woman can’t just get muscular like that with no additional work. I have nice, visible muscles, that give my whole fit body a more feminine look. I look like a girl-beast only when I flex my muscles (joking). My tummy is flat and my abs are visible for the first time in my life! So it’s pretty fun to look at my new fit body in the mirror, but yet again I feel like my mind has not caught up to the fit body I have in reality. I see myself in the mirror, I know it’s me, but that fit body that is looking back at me from the mirror surely isn’t my body, because I am not so fit and muscular.

I remembered the last time when I felt like this was when I lost weight and I was looking at my fit body in the mirror and feeling unable relating to it. It is happening again with my fit body. However, I lived through this before, so this time it doesn’t make me think that I am insane for not being able to see my fit body for what it is in reality.

I know that not being able to see my fit body is just a temporary phase and that my mind just needs a little more time to accept the new fit body. [Tweet this!]

I find revelation in the fact that I’ve been through this before, and successfully accepted my fit body. Now I once again need to accept my more muscular new fit body.

What can I do to speed up the progress of my mind accepting my new fit body?

Having the fit body of your dreams is new: your mind will need time to accept it. It will happen with time, but hey, let’s just speed up this process of your brain accepting your new body:

  1. Look at yourself more often: take a photo of your fit body where your muscles are showing and put the photo on the fridge or another visible place
  2. Get workout clothes that accentuate fit body features in the most flattering manner: look for a pair of workout pants and/or dry fit top that will make you look into the gym mirror more often!
  3. Take progress pictures: even if you don’t see your fit body gains in the mirror, looking back at older pictures (even if it was taken a month ago) will make you see how far you’ve come.
  4. Ask for reassurance: ask a friend or a significant other you trust if they see your muscles on your new fit body. My significant other wants to touch my abs all the time! Just don’t make it a habit to ask for reassurance a lot. Always think about your intent before asking for reassurance. Is your goal to remind yourself of what you already know?
  5. Compare: Look yourself in the mirror at the gym while working out and compare the fit body you see there with other bodies in the gym. You’ll see how far you’ve come.
  6. Go window shopping: Pick something out that you would never have dared to wear before and try it on just for the fun of it! I was trying on some dresses that I would have never even thought of wearing before. I didn’t buy it, because I have nowhere to wear it, but damn, I looked good!
  7. Ask for comparing: ask your friend or significant other to point out someone from a crowd of people or a celebrity who has a similar fit body composition as you. You’ll be surprised! Also, seeing other people who are similar to you will not trigger the same emotional response as seeing a picture of yourself would, therefore it’s helping you rationalize.

Could this be your story too? Are you are struggling with accepting your new fit body? Join my group of struggling girls on Google+! Don’t like other people? Sign up for an update about new posts! Click here>>>

Body acceptance by family after losing weight 2

Body acceptance by family after losing weight

It is ironic that my family are the people who see me the most often, yet they fight the biggest struggle accepting my fit body after losing weight.
Body acceptance by family after losing weight
“Jimmy is all skin and bones! Let’s bury him like a skeleton!”

I believe I’ve made progress in accepting my new fit body after significantly losing weight. It was a big realization moment when a friend of mine spoke to me about her struggling to accept my new fit body. It was that moment that I’ve realized that I am not the only one struggling to accept my fit body: people around me, friends, family, also fight their own struggles with accepting my new found fit body!

Never have I had an encounter with my overweight father and mother where they wouldn’t bring up in a casual conversation their worries about me losing weight and having a fit body – or as they refer to it now SKIN AND BONES.

How family sees Your new fit body after losing weight

At the beginning of my journey to losing weight right when the results of the healthy diet and regular exercises started to show, every time I visited my mother, she would ask me if I eat at all. This continued even after I’ve explained to her that I am overweight and I am working out to lose weight to reach the normal weight range on the BMI (Body Mass Index) scale for my height. Every time we’ve met, I had to explain again and again that I am eating, but choosing to eat healthy foods, exercising 3-5 times per week, so she is seeing the results of my healthy lifestyle changing my body. But she could not and still cannot accept that being fit and not overweight is healthy. I believe that this is partly due to the fact that I have been either obese or overweight the most part of my life, and seeing me in a healthy weight range is new, unconventional for my mother. The other explanation that is more deeper seeded reason for my family being unable to accept my new fit body image stems from their outdated views of a healthy body: they were raised in a world where poor people were skinny because they couldn’t afford enough food for themselves and their families. Being overweight meant being well-fed, and wealthier than the average. So my parents don’t see that with consumerism and the wide acceptance and availability of processed foods the standards have shifted. And being obese comes from consuming  unhealthy and available processed foods whereas being fit (or as they know it “skinny”) means that you pay attention to what you are eating and can afford the more expensive but healthier foods.

I have tried to explain this to my family many times – but their views of the world are so deep seated that they can’t accept the fact that:

Being fit/skinny does not equal being unhealthy/poor.[Tweet this!]

How to deal with family members who can’t accept Your body after losing weight

One of my cousins have also had a hard time accepting my new fit body. After I opened up to her about my body image issues after losing weight she admitted that she also had issues accepting the new me(!) and my new found fit body! She truly believed that me with a fit body wasn’t being myself and that there were times when she secretly wished I’d become fat again! But when I accepted myself and my new found fit body, she accepted it too! She was thinking that finally her old friend is back!

Body acceptance by family after losing weight 2
“We are here because Your mother asked us to convince you to stop making healthy lifestyle choices.”

Not being in tune with your body and mind is noticeable by other around you. Maybe they can’t put their finger on it, just like you couldn’t, but they sense the disruption in your “force”.

Your best bet when dealing with family members who can’t accept your new fit body after losing weight is to talk openly to them about the body acceptance issues you are facing. This will make them realize that they are also struggling with accepting your new fit body. Who knows, you could even find out interesting new things about your family members that you weren’t aware before, if you start talking openly and listening to what they are saying.

You feel like you are still struggling with accepting your new found fit body? Find help clicking here >>>

Fat body image issues

Fat body image issues

I am one of those woman who never talks with her friends about the struggles she is facing when they are happening, but shares the success story of the struggle after she overcame the difficulties. So it is only recently that I have started talking about my struggles regarding my fat body image I have in my head while not being able to see a fit body image reflection staring back at me from the mirror. I have discussed the problem of not being able to see the fit body in the mirror after significant weight loss in the past. Fat body image issues

Fat body image issues are almost part of the past, and I can now finally see my actual fit body image reflection in the mirror. The fat body image I had hold on to for so long finally seems to be disappearing. I am able to see my actual fit body image in the mirror instead of a fat body mirror image. Furthermore, I am finally starting to believe that the fit body image in the mirror is the real me! The fat body mind set and fat body image has started to float away. I am just starting to fully enjoy the fit body I worked so hard for.

It is still difficult to talk about the emotional experience of thinking and believing that I am going crazy because everyone around me says and sees me as fit, but I don’t see my body the way they see it, because only in my head I am still a woman in a fat body.

The truth is that seeing the real fit body image vs. seeing the perceived fat body image is a constant everyday battle. My body is getting fitter and fitter, but my mind does not see this. It is like my head is behind my body in time, it will take me a few months to accept the body image in my head that I currently have. In my mind I am fit, but not as fit as in reality. But it is a progress, and eventually the fat body image will be replaced by a fit body image. Fat body image issues

It is still puzzling for me how serious conditions with body image problems such as anorexia and other negative body image issues are taken seriously, and you can get counseling. However, body image issues that come with significant weight loss do not get the proper attention they should have.  In order to help myself with having a fat body image while actually being in a fit body, I had to browse through self help books written for low self esteem and serious negative body image issues, and select some tips that I thought would fit in my case as well. I tried a lot of the advices that I have came across about body image issues, and what worked for me was a quick 10 minute exercise that I did daily for a few weeks. Click here to find out about Exercise A and Exercise B >>>

Are you struggling with fat body image issues? Click here to find out!

If you want to read more about how to deal with issues related to fat body image click here >>

Please feel free to share your story of successful weight loss and not being able to see the results in the comments section below!