Tag Archives: downside of being fit

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weight

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weight

“Stop losing weight, you are too thin!” is the sentence I keep hearing day after day from friends, co-workers and acquaintances I meet. Let me share with you 5 different situations I have to face fit shaming during a regular week and the lessons I’ve learned during those encounters with the good intention bullies.

Fit shaming situations and lessons I’ve learned

Day #1:

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weight
More people in my office building would use the stairs if we had one of these escalators.

It is a beautiful Monday morning and I am heading towards my office while taking the stairs (like always since I’ve changed my lifestyle to a healthy one). The only one taking the stairs this morning (and on other mornings) with me is one girl who works on the 1st floor and recently got into heavy cardio workout 3 times per week. While we chitchat about it’s being Monday already, I suddenly hear her say the dreaded sentence:

“Stop losing weight, you are too thin!”

Instead of ignoring it this time while thinking how Mondays hate me too I reply with a brand new well-prepared answer for these situations I haven’t tried saying and failing before:

“I am 58kg/128lbs! I don’t believe that’s thin for my height (163cm/5 ft 4 in)!”

Her reply:

“Well, it is too thin!”

Lesson #1:

I can’t win with these people.


Day #2:

Stressful day at the office, being busy. Suddenly an ex co-worker drops by to say hi. She recognizes that this is not a good time for chitchat, so she cuts it short. She is already at the door, almost opening it, when casually instead of “Goodbye”she drops the bomb:

“Don’t lose more weight, you’ll disappear!”

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weight
This is how I imagined a stressful day at the office when I didn’t work in an office.

It is not her first time bringing this to my attention, I see her a few times a month, so it’s not like she hasn’t seen me fit. But today is the day that I choose to reply to her comment.

“I am not thin, look at all my muscles! I am 58kg/128lbs!”

She turns back, approaches me and tells me that 58kg/128lbs is almost nothing. So to prove my point of me being in a normal weight range for my height, I ask her how much does she weight.

She tells me: “You are not a woman if you are under 60kg! I weight 63kg!” and she leaves in a hurry, leaving me standing there and calculating in my head her BMI. She is way taller than I am (175cm) so if she weights 63kg it makes her BMI 20,6 which is lower than my BMI of 21,8. Yet, it’s still me, who is being bullied into not being a real woman because of her low weight.

Lesson #2:

I am being bullied about my weight by other women now that I am fit. While being obese, none of the women around me asked, mentioned or made rude remarks about my weight.


Day #3:

Running errands on a usual weekday when I bump into an old friend of mine. After a few sentences on how our lives are currently, she leans closer, lowers her voice and asks:

“What do you do to look thin like this?”

It’s like she’s expecting me to give her a well guarded secret that I somehow came across during my weight loss journey. I lean closer to her and say in a calm voice how I changed my nutrition, I eat healthy, I eat less, I regularly exercise.

“Oh, I see. I can’t do that. I don’t have time to workout. / I like cake too much. (*insert here a long list of personal excuses*)”

Lesson #3:

People say that they want to know my secret of how I’ve lost weight and became fit, when in reality they just want to hear that there is an easy way for them to do it that they haven’t heard of yet. The moment they figure out that it is discipline and hard work, they become uninterested.


Day #4:

Leaving my office for a lunch break when I meet a co-worker on the stairs going in the opposite direction. We say hi, I compliment her looks and she notices that we have matching pants! She complains about the pants getting too baggy after only two wears and I say that mine are fine. Then she looks at me from head to toe and says:

“Oh my god, look at you! You are so thin! I am not talking to you anymore!” says jokingly and leaves me there standing alone on the stairs.

Lesson #4:

If there is a grain of truth in every joke, I wonder if some women really stopped talking to me and started avoiding me out of envy after I’ve lost weight and became fit.


Day #5:

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weightAt the office again, having a coffee break (or in my case: green tea break) with my female co-workers. One of them says:

“Oh you are so thin! I can see on your face that you’ve lost weight!”

Today I’m trying out a new reply strategy, so I say:

“Thank you, I get that a lot! In fact, I get called thin every day!”

Suddenly one of my other co-workers, who is trying to lose weight herself by occasionally going on strict diets turns to me and says:

“Really? I bet your family thinks that you are too thin.” she adds.

“No, it’s not my family, they accepted the new fit me. Women around me point out every day how thin I am.”

Lesson #5:

People have no idea that fit shaming even exists. Even the woman who fit shame me are not aware of the fact that they are acting like a bully. They would never call their obese co-worker fat or obese, yet they are without a second thought calling me thin.

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Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit body

Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit body

Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit bodyAfter significant weight loss, friends, coworkers and acquaintances will start noticing your new found body. They will feel like it is time for them to compliment you on your new fit body. How can you accept these compliments without being rude or seeming awkward?

People around me noticed my weight loss and positive changes about my body way sooner than I have. It was annoying for a while to address their compliments and answer their questions about my fit body, and I hated it. But looking back I see now that their comments and questions helped me a lot with my mental barriers of accepting my new fit body.

Why people compliment on your weight loss success

I bet you want to know why someone is giving you a compliment on your weight loss. If you think that the person who complimented on your looks wants something from you, you will less likely believe the compliment. All this can make you interpret the compliment in a totally different way than it was intended.

Getting fit and losing weight affects not just your looks and attitude but also the perception of how others see you. There will be a change in people’s attitudes towards the new fit you.

Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit body
“Sir, I noticed your large beer belly has vanished! You look awesome!”
Smiles: “Thank you sir for noticing my fat crying.”

Part of their changed view comes from the fact that your looks have changed, and that change in your body becomes noticeable at a first glance to others. The other reason for from the fact that it’s not just your body that changed, but your attitude as well. Your improved self confidence you’ve gained with regular workout shines through.

These are just some of the reasons why you are drawing wanted (or unwanted) attention of your friends and acquaintances. You may find this to be pleasing, and it can even give you a temporary boost in motivation to workout harder. On the other hand, if you are like me, you will find all this sudden rush of attention unwelcome and have mixed feelings about people who unexpectedly shower you with compliments, and struggle with finding the best way to deal with all that sincere or false openness.

Some people will be thrilled about your success, because you’ve accomplished what they are just hoping to achieve one day. As may it be fascinating for you at first to hear the compliments, you will grow tired of them soon after. Especially when you realize that what they say is actually a reflection of their own biases, self-doubt and flaws.

How you are currently dealing with compliments about your weight loss

Until now, you’ve dealt with compliments about your successful weight loss in one of the 3 possible ways:

  1. Rejecting the compliment
  2. Deflecting the compliment
  3. Accepting the compliment

How you are dealing with a compliment about your successful weight loss tells about you a lot.

The way you deal with compliments reflects your level of self-esteem and self-worth. [Tweet this!]

If compliments on your successful weight loss make you feel uncomfortable, it is because the compliments contradicts your own self-view.

1. Rejecting a compliment

“- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

“- No, I don’t look great.”

When it comes to compliments about your looks, an inner fat girl makes you deny that the flattery could be true.

If you have high self-esteem then you will reject the compliment because you want to be perceived as modest.

Just imagine how it feels for the other person when he or she says something nice with his or her best intentions, and you reject it. This is the worst you can do. You undermine the compliment or insult the compliment giver by rejecting a compliment about your weight loss.

2. Deflecting the compliment

There are 3 ways to deflect a compliment about your successful weight loss:

  • Self-insult:

    “- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

    “- No, I did not lose a lot of weight. My lose clothing makes me look like I’ve lost a lot of weight, but trust me, I am still fat under it.”

  • Denial:

    “- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

    “- No, I don’t. Look, I have batwings under my arms.”

  • Boomerang:

    “- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

    “- You look amazing too! Is that a new necklace you’re wearing?”

Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit body
“I love your t-shirt!”
“Umm…look at this pebble.”

The problem with deflecting a compliment abut your successful weight loss is that you give the impression that you don’t respect the opinion of the person who gave you the compliment. You should return the compliment, but not right away. Say something nice about the person who gave you the compliment about your successful weight loss the next time you two meet.

3. Accepting the compliment

Your best bet is to just accept the compliment about your successful weight loss that has been given you.

“- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

“- Thanks, that’s very kind of you!”

If you want to follow it up with an explanation of how you’ve worked hard for looking like this, feel free.

Actually, accepting a compliment about your successful weight loss is a compliment for itself. By accepting the compliment someone gave you, you are suggesting them that you trust their judgement, wisdom and opinion, and you appreciate what they have to say.

Lesson on how to accept a compliment about weight loss

Even if you don’t agree with a compliment, you should take it gracefully. Respect the compliment giver by accepting the compliment. Say this if you are accepting a compliment on your successful weight loss if you don’t agree with what the other person said about you:

  • “Thank you”, “Thank you very much”
  • “Thanks, I appreciate that.”
  • “Thanks, that’s a lovely thing to say.”
  • “Thanks, that makes me feel good.”
  • “Thanks, that means a lot to me.”
  • “Thanks, you’re very kind.”

If you agree with a compliment given to you about your successful weight loss, accept the compliment by saying the following things:

  • “Thanks. I’m really glad you noticed that I’ve lost significant weight because it’s something I’m proud of too.”
  • “Thanks! I trained really hard.”

Don’t be focused on the content of the compliment when receiving one, but rather focus on receiving the compliment. And don’t forget to smile!

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Secrets on how to dress while losing weight

Secrets on how to dress while losing weight

Dressing yourself while losing weight gets harder as you keep on losing weight. You notice that all your existing clothes becomes lose and ill fitting. However, you haven’t reached your goal weight yet! So how should you dress yourself while losing weight? Should you shop for new pants every two weeks for your smaller after every 10 pounds you lose? You could, if you want to… But I have a better option for you! Let me tell you the secrets on how to dress while losing weight!

First I will present you which type of clothes you should aim for when putting together a wardrobe for the ongoing process of losing weight.

Then I’ll share my 4 tricks that can build you a transitional wardrobe while losing weight!

If you are clueless about what clothes to wear while losing weight or how to dress yourself while losing weight then read on.

A. What to wear while losing weight

1. Clothes with a bit of stretch

The more stretch the better: it will fit you longer during your weightloss journey. Look for pants, skirts, tops and dresses with Lycra.

Stretchy fabrics

2. Pants, shorts and skirts with an elastic waist

An elastic waist ensures that you’ll be able to wear that clothing item even when you lose a significant amount of weight. It is a quick and easy way to make your pants, shorts and skirts fit as you go through different stages of weight loss.

Elastic waist clothes

 3. Use belts

I discovered the usefulness of belts while I was going from fat to fit. They are great in keeping your loose pants on! I had to make new holes in my existing belts every other week while I was losing weight. You can try getting yourself a new belt with a slide-ring that you will be able to use throughout your weight loss journey.

4. Wrap dresses, skirts, blouses

Wrap dresses

Anything that wraps is great, because it is more forgiving of weight fluctuations and you can get more wear out of them.

5. Side tab trousers and skirts

They are a great option because you can adjust the size of the waist with the tabs on the sides. You can expand or contract the waistline easily to fit your new shape.

6. Draped tops

You can get a lot of wear out of draped tops or dresses as they are not size specific. It looks great with almost everything, and they can dress up any basic clothing item, such as a simple long sleeved t-shirt, jeans or skirt.

Draped tops

7. Leggings

Leggings are a wardrobe must have! They can be very comfortable, and they are a great choice if you are still losing weight. They can be paired with many different clothing items. Leggings are a great layering piece! They add a lot to an outfit and are a fashionable and easy way to add warmth during the cooler fall months.

8. Empire waist dresses and tops

The good thing about frocks is that they enhance your silhouette. Empire waist dresses and tops have a fitted bodice ending just below the bust, giving it a high-waisted appearance. You can find empire waist dresses and tops in various styles that will fit your fashion taste.

Empire waist dresses

B. 4 tips on how to get clothes that fit you while losing weight

But what if you are not a big fan of shopping or you like the clothes you currently have and would like to continue wearing the clothing items even if they are hanging lose on you? No problem! Here are my 4 tips on how to dress yourself while losing weight if you are on a budget or don’t like shopping:

Tip #1: Tailor your favorite clothing items

Tailoring some of the big clothes is a good idea for items you really like. In my case tailoring my big clothes wasn’t an option, because I don’t have a tailor I trust and the few clothing items I took to a tailor to fix were a disaster and I ended up not wearing them at all. Plus, I truly believe that you should not force your new fit body into old fat clothes. Enjoy the feeling of fitting into new, smaller clothing items!

Tip #2: Swap clothes with friends

Organize a clothing swap party! Include friends of all sizes and shapes! Hosting a clothing swap party is awesome in so many ways: you can get rid of your old fat clothes and find well fitting clothes while in the process of losing weight! Plus you get to hang out with your friends!

Tip #3: Check out thrift stores and second-hand stores

It’s not just and inexpensive way to shop at thrift stores, but many times you can dug up real treasure in there! You can get quality items for cheap. Look for natural fibers such as wool, silk, cashmere, leather as they are long lasting and become softer with age. Plus reusing clothes is eco-friendly!

Tip #4: Stay away from jeans

Or if jeans are a basic clothing item in your wardrobe, then search for jeans with high elasticity. The higher the elastic percentage in the denim, the more wears you’ll be able to get out of them while losing weight. The downside of jeans with high elasticity is that they stretch out more easily than denim with low elasticity. You can protect the stretchy fabric by using the delicate setting on your washing machine.

Want more fun tips to help you on your weight loss journey? Click here for my weekly updates>>>

How to deal with family saying I am too skinny after losing weight when I am actually just being fit

How to deal with family saying I am too skinny after losing weight when I am actually just being fit

After losing weight and going from obese to fat to fit my family says I am too skinny. My family is using every opportunity to tell me that I am too skinny, I am not eating enough, being skinny is not healthy, skinny is ugly, I will get sick if I lose more weight and keep up exercising(!!??). So how do I deal with family like this?

How to deal with family saying I am too skinny after losing weight when I am actually just being fit Imagine this scenario: family gathering, family members sitting around the table stuffed with food, eating. Then suddenly grandma turns to you and says:

– Sweety, you are eating like a bird. Here, have some more potatoes!

Your plate and mouth are full of delicious roasted chicken, and while you are trying to swallow that bite of Brussels sprouts and start explaining that you are eating right, your father joins the “conversation” and says:

– Eat more! Skinny people are ugly!

You finally swallowed that bite and start defending yourself by telling them that as they can see, you are eating. In fact, you were chewing when grandma turned against you. Plus you are not skinny, but fit. There’s a difference. And you start flexing your muscles to prove your point. All this, while your husband quickly goes into supportive mode and starts explaining that your weight is in the normal range. You cut his sentence in the middle to inform everyone that if they remember, not long ago you were obese. You worked hard to lose weight in order to look like this. This ain’t no accident.

But they seem like they hear what you are saying but anything that you say does not convince them that this is healthy. For them, you are way too skinny. They loved the fat girl, not you, the fit girl.

Now imagine this scenario repeating itself every Sunday. For the past 8 months. Sunday family time equals living in hell.

Sounds familiar? Then keep reading to find out how to deal with family (or friends) saying you are too skinny when in fact you’ve lost weight and went from obese to fat to fit!

Some of my favorite things my family says to me after I’ve lost weight and went from fat to fit are:

1. “We are concerned about your health”

How to deal with family saying I am too skinny after losing weight when I am actually just being fit
“Here, have my pills, they will make you healthy fat again.”

That’s right, my overweight and obese family members are concerned about me not taking care of myself. My family and relatives with diabetes, cardiovascular diseases, indigestion problems and obesity are giving me health advice. Yeah, I should definitely follow their advice – if I want to end up with those kind of health problems. The thing is: I don’t. It was my main motivation to start living a healthy lifestyle and start working out regularly to avoid all of the above mentioned health problems that I’ve seen my family members struggle with.

Polite reply while dealing with family:

– Thank you for your concern, but I am fine. I have never felt this good in my life before. I am energized, focused and I sleep good. In fact, I have my latest blood test results with me as a proof that everything is okay with me. Care to check?

They never check.

Angry reply while dealing with family:

– I just had my blood test results back. My doctor says I am in top shape! How are your results?

Trust me, they’ll never ask you about your health again.

 2. “You look too skinny”

It’s like you can do nothing about becoming fat, but being fit or how they call it, “skinny” is something you should be fixing – by eating more!

Polite reply while dealing with family:

– I am fit, not skinny. And I worked hard for looking like this, it didn’t happen by accident. I want to look like this.

Angry reply while dealing with family:

– I think you look a little heavy.

Just be prepared that they will get offended, because the social norm is people thinking it is  okay to call someone skinny, but telling them that they are fat is considered really rude. You won’t get more comments about being too skinny. Though very few people in your family will like you after that.

 3. “Are you still on that diet?”

How to deal with family saying I am too skinny after losing weight when I am actually just being fit
“See? Orange juice is better than apples and bananas.”

I regret the day I told my family that I don’t eat chocolate. Every time we meet, they have to double check if I am still not eating it. So I started eating it around them.

Not to mention my husband and his keto diet. Family just don’t understand what eating bad means. For them, bad food means that it is spoiled. There is no such food in their dictionary that will make you sick, unless it’s rotten.

A diet in my family’s head equals strict dietary limitations, staying unrealistically thin and depriving yourself of the foods you love. For them, you are not on a healthy eating plan, you are dieting. And it can’t be kept up in the long run.

So what to answer when they ask you if you are still dieting?

Polite reply while dealing with family:

– It is not a diet, I am eating healthy. I developed healthy eating habits for long term. This is a complete lifestyle change, not a 12 week eating plan.

Angry reply while dealing with family:

– Do you believe it is healthy to eat even when you are not feeling hungry? Did you know that hunger is the body’s way to let you know that it needs nourishment?

My overweight family believes that I am way too skinny – for them being overweight is normal. Sometimes it seems to me that in our society, where most people are overweight, being overweight is the new norm. Being fit equals being too skinny.

If your family’s constant remarks bothers you, then you need to learn how to deal with family. Try explaining them the reasons of why you choose to live a healthy lifestyle, and be sure to tell them how you feel better now that you are working out regularly and eating healthy. If this doesn’t help, then do what I did: shut them up by threatening them! I told them that if they keep bullying me, I won’t visit them anymore. Never heard a bad remark again.

Found this guide useful? Get more useful quick tips on how to motivate yourself towards a lifestyle full of healthy habits! Click here>>>

How to accept fit body after weight loss

Having fit body but being unable to see it: how to accept new fit body

How to accept fit body after weight lossRemember how I’ve had problems dealing with phantom fat in the past? I struggled with accepting my smaller fit body after being obese and fat most of my life.

After losing weight and becoming fit the issue that I am struggling with is similar to seeing a fat self image instead of a new fit body. The problem I am having is that I can’t see the muscles and my body for what it is. After losing significant weight and becoming fit I started weightlifting because I was losing more muscle than fat. So I figured that weightlifting is a way to go to improve my new fit body. Plus, I’ve read awesome things about the benefits of weightlifting for a woman, so I had to give it a try.

How to address the emotional side of not being able to see your new fit body for what it is

How to accept fit body after losing weightAs it feels awesome to be able to carry my own groceries, it feels strange to look in the mirror at the gym to see muscles on my body where there used to be fat. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have manly muscles, because a woman can’t just get muscular like that with no additional work. I have nice, visible muscles, that give my whole fit body a more feminine look. I look like a girl-beast only when I flex my muscles (joking). My tummy is flat and my abs are visible for the first time in my life! So it’s pretty fun to look at my new fit body in the mirror, but yet again I feel like my mind has not caught up to the fit body I have in reality. I see myself in the mirror, I know it’s me, but that fit body that is looking back at me from the mirror surely isn’t my body, because I am not so fit and muscular.

I remembered the last time when I felt like this was when I lost weight and I was looking at my fit body in the mirror and feeling unable relating to it. It is happening again with my fit body. However, I lived through this before, so this time it doesn’t make me think that I am insane for not being able to see my fit body for what it is in reality.

I know that not being able to see my fit body is just a temporary phase and that my mind just needs a little more time to accept the new fit body. [Tweet this!]

I find revelation in the fact that I’ve been through this before, and successfully accepted my fit body. Now I once again need to accept my more muscular new fit body.

What can I do to speed up the progress of my mind accepting my new fit body?

Having the fit body of your dreams is new: your mind will need time to accept it. It will happen with time, but hey, let’s just speed up this process of your brain accepting your new body:

  1. Look at yourself more often: take a photo of your fit body where your muscles are showing and put the photo on the fridge or another visible place
  2. Get workout clothes that accentuate fit body features in the most flattering manner: look for a pair of workout pants and/or dry fit top that will make you look into the gym mirror more often!
  3. Take progress pictures: even if you don’t see your fit body gains in the mirror, looking back at older pictures (even if it was taken a month ago) will make you see how far you’ve come.
  4. Ask for reassurance: ask a friend or a significant other you trust if they see your muscles on your new fit body. My significant other wants to touch my abs all the time! Just don’t make it a habit to ask for reassurance a lot. Always think about your intent before asking for reassurance. Is your goal to remind yourself of what you already know?
  5. Compare: Look yourself in the mirror at the gym while working out and compare the fit body you see there with other bodies in the gym. You’ll see how far you’ve come.
  6. Go window shopping: Pick something out that you would never have dared to wear before and try it on just for the fun of it! I was trying on some dresses that I would have never even thought of wearing before. I didn’t buy it, because I have nowhere to wear it, but damn, I looked good!
  7. Ask for comparing: ask your friend or significant other to point out someone from a crowd of people or a celebrity who has a similar fit body composition as you. You’ll be surprised! Also, seeing other people who are similar to you will not trigger the same emotional response as seeing a picture of yourself would, therefore it’s helping you rationalize.

Could this be your story too? Are you are struggling with accepting your new fit body? Join my group of struggling girls on Google+! Don’t like other people? Sign up for an update about new posts! Click here>>>

What people who successfully lost weight are hiding from you: 5 alarming things about your new fit body

What people who successfully lost weight are hiding from You: 5 alarming things about Your new fit body

It seems like that while being fat, somehow you forgot about things like a belly button, hip bones, collar bones, ribcage being a part of your body. They just disappear altogether in the sea of fat. While I was fat, I had no visible ribcage, belly button, hip bones or collar bones.

As you know, weight loss affects your whole body: there is no such thing as losing fat only from your hip bones or around your belly button. You just can’t spot reduce. So when losing fat, it will also mean that your ribcage, collar bones and hip bones will start to show. You’ll notice them in the mirror and your hip bones and belly button will alarm you. You’ll be able to touch and feel your collar bones and see your belly button, and when you do so, you will be freaked out about this fact.

The 5 most alarming things about your body after weight loss will be the following:

1. Belly button changes from sad face to weird hole

My whole fat life, my belly button looked kinda sad. When I started to lose weight, I was looking forward to the day when I will have a flat tummy and a happy belly button. Well, that’s not how this whole scenario played out.

What people who successfully lost weight are hiding from you: 5 alarming things about your new fit body
That weird hole in the middle of your body.
Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

After your weight loss, your belly button changes as well. It becomes this weird hole, with a little leftover fat (or without fat) with saggy skin over the belly button.

Having a fat belly my whole life and not being able to see the end of my belly button, being able to see further down that hole freaks the hell out of me. I catch myself staring at my belly button wondering if it should look like that. What if I lose all the excess fat, how will my belly button look then? Will I be left with lots of loose skin around my belly button that I will even be able to pinch? The belly button is not gross or anything like that, it’s just weird having a different one than I am used to having for so long.

I went to the extreme and asked one of the fit girls at the gym if I could see her belly button so that I could compare mine to hers. She was totally cool with it, so we compared belly buttons. I got to examine her belly button, and after that I examined lots of other girl’s belly buttons. Weirdo, I know. And I can say that my belly button looks similar to their belly buttons – it’s not completely the same, as it can’t be – but it looks acceptable.

However, looking at belly buttons of strangers wasn’t enough to quiet my mind. I have accepted that the shape of my belly button is considered normal, yet it still feels weird having this kind of a belly button instead of a sad fat belly button I always had.

2. Your whole ribcage starts to freak you out

Fat loss is systematic in your body – if you are female, first you loose fat in the top half of your body. It means that your ribcage will at some point become exposed. Your ribcage becomes smaller when you lose weight because you lose subcutaneous fat, the layer of fat directly below the skin.

Let me tell you: you are not used to being able to feel your bones like this, so like all the other psychological issues, you will need to face this one too, and it will take some time for you to accept that it is ok to be able to feel your ribs when you touch your ribcage.

 3. Hip bones become more visible

What people who successfully lost weight are hiding from you: 5 alarming things about your new fit body
She has visible hip bones.
Image courtesy of adamr at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Don’t get me wrong: there’s a difference between the shape of hip bones being visible beneath that outer layer of skin, hip bones being really defined, and hip bones jutting out. My hip bones became visible beneath the layer of the skin with all that fat gone, yet in my head it feels like my hip bones are standing out too much. I know it is the way I was made, so I can really do nothing about my hip bones being visible.

Visible bones on my body seemed so far fetched awhile ago. And now I am surprised every time by my hip bones when I roll over in my bed, and I feel like a skeleton.

While being fat, I was never focused specifically on my hip bone area. The problem I started having when the fat disappeared from my tummy area and my hip bones became visible was that I was very frequently bumping into things. Doors and chairs were enemies of mine, and it was always me leaving the battle with bruises, especially around my hip bones.

Luckily, with accepting my new fit body, the blue bruises disappeared, and my defined hip bones stopped bothering me.

4. Collar bones

Collar bones are the least of my worries. I often find myself running my fingers over my collar bones. I thought that finally having girly collar bones when I become fit is going to be a huge issue, but turns out it is not that much entertainment. Weird thing that while you are fat, you want collar bones. You will do anything to get collar bones. Even apply makeup to achieve the affect of having real collar bones:

What people who successfully lost weight are hiding from you: 5 alarming things about your new fit body
3 steps to get collar bones without losing weight

When you are fit, you just have collar bones, and they are not a big deal anymore. So wishing for collar bones means that you need to start losing weight!

5. That lump on Your chest isn’t a sign of You dying

I was worried about a lump I’ve felt on my chest, so I went to see my doctor. She asked me to show where the lump is, and when my doctor felt it, turned to me, smiled and said that I am now feeling my sternum! I was relieved and embarrassed at the same time: I have never felt my sternum as a grownup, and completely forgot about it.

Here is a detailed picture of a sternum in case you also forgot that it even exists in your body:

"Sternum animation3" by Anatomography - en:Anatomography (setting page of this image). Licensed under CC-BY-SA-2.1-jp via Wikimedia Commons.
Sternum animation3” by Anatomography – en:Anatomography (setting page of this image). Licensed under CC-BY-SA-2.1-jp via Wikimedia Commons.

 One thing you need to remember is that it is completely acceptable for you to feel freaked out about seeing your collar bones, hip bones, ribs and rib cage as well as weird parts of your belly button. It will take but you will soon accept these body parts as being a part of you.

You won’t bump your hip bones into chairs, you won’t be asking strangers to show their belly buttons so that you can compare yours to theirs, and you won’t lie in your bed at night stressed out about that lump in your chest that will turn out to be your sternum that you never touched before in your life.

Here are some useful quick tips on how to speed up the process of accepting your new fit body after your weight loss! Click here>>>

Need help getting over your fears and frustrations after losing weight? Try the awesome tips given in this book>>>

How not to freak out about losing workout routine while injured or sick

How not to freak out about losing workout routine while injured or sick

It happens if you workout regularly: sometimes you get injured or sick and you can’t do your workout routine like you planned. Your control freak mind gets stressed instantly by screaming at you one of the following two sentences when you are injured or sick:

Freak out #1: Oh my god, I’m gonna get fat if I don’t workout!

How not to freak out about losing workout routine while injured or sick
For calculating your TDEE you will need a pen, a notebook, a measuring tape and a tomato. The tomato is crucial, trust me.

Don’t worry, I have good news for you: you can avoid weight gain even if you can’t work out because you got injured or sick. It’s all just math: if you eat enough calories to maintain your weight, you won’t get fat nor lose weight if you are injured or sick. When you work out, the formula is different: you can eat more calories and burn the excess with working out. Now, if you haven’t already figured out how much calories you need to eat in order to maintain your weight, you can do it by heading to a Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE) calculator here. It will help you figure out how much calories you will need to eat while injured or sick.

There, we addressed your biggest fear of not working out when injured or sick.

So what’s the second fear of not working out when injured or sick?

Freak out #2: But I will lose my fit form, if I don’t work out!

The most important thing you need to know is: you injured yourself or got sick because your body is sending you a message!

How not to freak out about losing workout routine while injured or sickGetting injured while working out means that you haven’t payed enough attention to your workout and you were pushing yourself harder than you should have. So the last thing you need to do is making the injury worse by further pushing yourself. Take a few days off of your workout routine, so that you can access the damage.

If it’s an injury that takes longer to heal, then after a few days you can start coming up with a plan to work around your injury or sickness. This means that if you’ve hurt your ankle, you can try to come up with exercises that will not require your ankle: build your upper body, use hand weights! Modify your workout routine to fit your current state. You can always find an activity that will get your heart rate up and keep your blood flowing.

However, I highly recommend that you just use this time of being injured or sick to rest and recover. Sometimes we all need a little break. Remember:

Working out is not a destination. It is a way of life. [Tweet this!]

Get back to your workout routine slowly, with time.

How not to freak out about losing workout routine while injured or sickDon’t worry, you can take time off your workout routine while injured or sick, and still be able to maintain your form.  No matter how much muscle or strength you lose while laying in your bed injured or sick, you will gain it back much faster than it took you to gain it at the first place. This is just one of the reasons why lifting weights is awesome. It has long-lasting effects on your muscles. Thumbs up for muscle memory! It is an awesome thing!

In fact, just relax, don’t worry too much about missing a few workouts, because it’s not a big deal. Just think about how awesome you are for making a lifestyle change and sticking with it! The fact that your brain wants to workout even when you are injured or sick shows your dedication and commitment! Just think about all the awesome things you’ve accomplished so far!  You are truly awesome! Everything is awesome! Even the Lego figures agree on that one:

 Need even more support in your healthy life journey? Click here to get free access to more useful tips>>>

Fat body image issues

Fat body image issues

I am one of those woman who never talks with her friends about the struggles she is facing when they are happening, but shares the success story of the struggle after she overcame the difficulties. So it is only recently that I have started talking about my struggles regarding my fat body image I have in my head while not being able to see a fit body image reflection staring back at me from the mirror. I have discussed the problem of not being able to see the fit body in the mirror after significant weight loss in the past. Fat body image issues

Fat body image issues are almost part of the past, and I can now finally see my actual fit body image reflection in the mirror. The fat body image I had hold on to for so long finally seems to be disappearing. I am able to see my actual fit body image in the mirror instead of a fat body mirror image. Furthermore, I am finally starting to believe that the fit body image in the mirror is the real me! The fat body mind set and fat body image has started to float away. I am just starting to fully enjoy the fit body I worked so hard for.

It is still difficult to talk about the emotional experience of thinking and believing that I am going crazy because everyone around me says and sees me as fit, but I don’t see my body the way they see it, because only in my head I am still a woman in a fat body.

The truth is that seeing the real fit body image vs. seeing the perceived fat body image is a constant everyday battle. My body is getting fitter and fitter, but my mind does not see this. It is like my head is behind my body in time, it will take me a few months to accept the body image in my head that I currently have. In my mind I am fit, but not as fit as in reality. But it is a progress, and eventually the fat body image will be replaced by a fit body image. Fat body image issues

It is still puzzling for me how serious conditions with body image problems such as anorexia and other negative body image issues are taken seriously, and you can get counseling. However, body image issues that come with significant weight loss do not get the proper attention they should have.  In order to help myself with having a fat body image while actually being in a fit body, I had to browse through self help books written for low self esteem and serious negative body image issues, and select some tips that I thought would fit in my case as well. I tried a lot of the advices that I have came across about body image issues, and what worked for me was a quick 10 minute exercise that I did daily for a few weeks. Click here to find out about Exercise A and Exercise B >>>

Are you struggling with fat body image issues? Click here to find out!

If you want to read more about how to deal with issues related to fat body image click here >>

Please feel free to share your story of successful weight loss and not being able to see the results in the comments section below!

Tips to keep body fit while on summer holiday 1

Tips to keep body fit while on summer holiday

Did you know that the fitter you are the faster you will lose your fitness? I know, so unfair!

You will lose your cardio capabilities way faster than your achieved muscular strength.

Tips to keep body fit while on summer holiday 1Enjoying your summer holiday it is almost impossible to watch what you eat and keeping it only healthy meals and watch you weight while being away from home. If you travel abroad, there will be the temptation of trying all those delicious and yummy local specialties you just can’t miss out! If you are lucky, they will be healthy foods, exotic fruits that you can enjoy without feeling remorse. However, if you are unlucky like me, the delicacies you try while on your summer holiday will mostly be on the unhealthy but delicious side of the food pyramid. This means that by indulging in new meal specialties during your summer get away will have an impact on your weight.

So what can you do about no gaining too much weight and lose your fit body while on a holiday?

1. Monitor water intake

When it’s hot outside, and you are enjoying yourself on the beach, many times you’ll think that what you crave is ice-cream or keeping it a best case scenario, fruits. This craving that you feel may just mean that you got dehydrated because you simply forgot to drink water. So instead of standing in line for ice-cream, just have a glass of water. It will keep you hydrated and if you still feel hungry afterwards you can always go for a snack. But drink water first!

2. Get creative!

There are various opportunities waiting for you to take them in order to get an exercise! Surely you will not be able to stick to your regular workout routine while on a holiday, but that is no excuse for you to completely skip exercising! If your hotel has a pool, problem solved! Swim 20 fast laps and then 3 slow laps for cool-down. Rent a bike to check out the tourist attractions! Put your walking shoes on and hit the road! Go for a run in the morning when it’s still not that hot outside! Exercise on the beach by using your own body as weights!

3. Go dance those calories away!

Dance on the beach when you hear your favorite summer song! Go to a bar or a disco and dance, dance, dance! There is no better way for you to get moving and enjoy yourself with your friends! It is a great opportunity for you to get to know the foreigners while abroad and learn new dance moves from the locals.

4. Choose the stairs

Instead of using the elevator, opt for the stairs every time. Use stairs to get to the top of that tower for a pretty view of the city’s skyline!

5. Play games

Have a ping-pong tournament with your friends! Play frisbee or volleyball on the beach, or go golfing. Mini-golf counts too! Or just play tennis in the hotel’s court. All these a great activities to get yourself moving!

6. Plan the exercise activities for every day

It might just be a long walk on the beach, a medium intensity aqua aerobic class in the hotel’s pool or a sight-seeing bike tour, but be sure to do something that will keep you active every day while on a vacation! Hike up a mountain or go scuba diving or snorkeling: it will give you new experience, great memories and raise your overall happiness.

7. Pack travel friendly healthy snack for the road

Tips to keep body fit while on summer holiday 2
I have 9 carrots, 3 kohlrabies and 5 peaches in that bag.

Bring fruits and veggies with you while traveling instead of cookies, chips and chocolate bars! A plastic container filled with sliced carrots and kohlrabies and other veggies of your choice takes no time to prepare, and it will provide you the vitamins during your travel. It is a great solution for keeping your regular daily bowel movements.

Remember: doing something is always better than not doing anything at all.

And this is true for your exercise regimen while spending your summer vacation away from home. Be proud of yourself if you manage to maintain half of your usual routine while on vacation! Just stay positive, be creative and mix it up! You’ll get your daily dose of exercise while being away from home in a fun and entertaining way!

Downside to losing fat no one is telling you about (Part 2)

Boy, there are a lot of misconceptions among overweight people who are starting to lose weight about how their life will change for the better after weightloss and 4 of those misconceptions were cropped up in last week’s post.

You found out about the psychological issues and wardrobe problems that will arise from getting from fat to fit (see Part 1) and this week you will find out that there are more issues that will freak you out when you hit that desired number on the scale.

Check out the remaining 6 drawbacks from the 2 part series of going from fat to fit that no one will tell you:

5. Cleaning and doing dishes more frequently

If you’ve lost weight the unhealthy way (extreme dieting, drugs and pills, laxatives, enhanced-buzz-1800-1372102705-9smoking, etc. – don’t want to continue the list of giving you bad ideas) then you are not experiencing this one. However, if you’ve lost weight the healthy way by sneaking veggies into your meals to trim fat and traded takeout menus for a cookbook, then chances are you spend a lot of time in the kitchen. Cutting calories and fat with healthy home made meals means more dirty dishes. Let’s admit, it’s tough to want to cook when there is a pile of dishes or pans there already, so you will find yourself cleaning and doing dishes multiple times during the day.

6. Your ribcage freaks you out

Weight loss affects your body as a whole.

There is no such thing as losing fat only from

She really likes bones. Image copyright
She really likes bones. Not like you.
Image copyright

your hips or thighs. You can’t spot reduce fat with diet or exercise.
[Tweet this!]

Fat loss is systematic in your body – if you are female, first you loose fat in the top half of your body. It means that your ribcage will at some point become exposed. Your ribcage becomes smaller when you lose weight because you lose subcutaneous fat, the layer of fat directly below the skin.

It also means that your ribs, collarbones and hipbones will start to show, you’ll notice them in the mirror, and it will alarm you. You’ll be able to touch them, and when you do so, you will be freaked out about it. You are not used to being able to feel your bones like this, so like all the other psychological issues, you will need to face this one too, and it will take some time for you to accept that it is ok to be able to feel your ribs.

 7. Hands will shrink

Loosing weight means that your body will become smaller. You were prepared for getting rid of your excess belly fat when you started an active, healthy lifestyle. But you weren’t prepared that your hands will also shrink! As well as your fingers!

Fingers, just like most areas of your body, can store fat. When you lose weight, your hands and fingers become slimmer along with the rest of your body.  It means that you will have to get rid of all your old rings. However, everyone is different, so it’s impossible to predict in advance how much your ring size will decrease after you lose weight.

Tip: try rings on different fingers, maybe you’ll be able to wear your favorite ring on a different finger if it gets too big.

8. Feeling cold easily

Having body fat has its advantages: your own body fat helps to keep you warm – it’s like an extra layer of clothing under your skin. Scientists found that swimmers with a greater body mass index (BMI) appear to be at much lower risk of getting hypothermia. This means that when you lose fat, you become more vulnerable to the cold – you will feel cold more easily.

This puppy is cold just like you, so he carries with himself a cute sweater. So should you. Image copyright
This puppy is cold just like you, so he got a cute sweater. So should you.
Image copyright

If you feel that your hands and feet are always cold, it may be due to the fact that your calorie intake is too low. You just have to raise your calorie intake by eating more healthy food (the healthy choice is fruits and vegetables) and problem solved! A faster and fashionable fix to this issue is to always take an extra sweater with you everywhere you go, unless it’s too hot outside. Building more muscles may also offer protection against the cold, because muscle tissue generates lots of heat. So basically all this means that people who handle cold easily are either fat or fit.

On the bright side, being fit makes summer weather more bearable.

9. Your weight loss will be all that people around you want to talk about

Be prepared that after you’ve accomplished the goal you thought was unattainable (yes, I mean changing your pudding body to sexy god body), it will draw attention of people around you. It was creeping me out that now after all this time of saying hello and insignificant small talk these people are giving me more attention and telling me how great I look. Makes me wonder if they thought that I was ugly obese before and why none of them ever bothered to bring that to my attention.

Becoming fit also can turn old friends into jealous frenemies. If you come from lalala pink fluffy rainbow land, then this may come as a surprise, but people can get bitter when you accomplish something that they haven’t or can’t. Family included!

So you can expect that everyone around you will be asking to share your weight loss success story whenever they get the opportunity to initiate a conversation with you. Basically, your weight and looks will be the only thing they really want to talk about. You will be asked about how much weight you have lost multiple times during the day. People will bring up their excuses of how they can’t change their bad habits. They will be suspicious of you sustaining your routine and results in the long run.

Tip: when you receive a positive comment about your body, say “Thanks!” and move on to other things. Don’t forget to return the compliment later.  Some people like to compliment straight away, but be very careful that you’re doing this for genuine reasons and not simply as a way of discounting the original compliment made to you.

10. You won’t see your new thin body

People who used to be fat still carry that fat body image in their minds even after they loose the excess weight. Their perception of themselves does not change, and it takes time for their brain to adjust to the new, smaller body size. So basically it means that when you look in the mirror, you’ll see a fit body, but your mind will be unable to connect to it, it will feel unfamiliar, outlandish. For you, that image can’t match you, because you are fat. So when everyone around you starts to notice that you’ve become a smaller sized person, you just stand there, and rationally know that you are smaller, but you won’t see yourself small. You are, and always have been a fatso.

I already addressed this issue in my previous post about the struggles with body image distortion after weight loss, I will just say that nothing can prepare you for the psychological battle that you will need to fight with yourself about self body image in order to accept your new fit body.

Interested in facts about your body after weight loss? Click here to get more tips>>>