We've all heard the misconception that weight lifting will make a woman big, bulky, and she will lose her feminine side. I've addressed these misconceptions earlier, so we've established that weight lifting won't make you accidentally look like The Rock. But what can you do when becoming physically stronger than most of the guys around you makes you feel less feminine and sexy?
Is it possible to stay feminine and sexy as a woman on the inside while weight lifting?
Yes, it is possible to stay feminine and sexy as a woman while weight lifting. But the real question is how? Spending time in the weigh lifting section of the gym among guys 3 times a week can influence not just your weight lifting abilities and body, but your perception of yourself as well.
Imagine yourself after few months of weight lifting seeing a guy with big manly muscles use the same weight dumbbells as you. Pretty self confidence booster, isn’t it? Now fast forward a few months of regular weight lifting, and you’ll be watching more and more guys using smaller dumbbells than you are. After 9 months of weight lifting there will be only few regular guys at the gym using heavier weights for weight lifting than you.
This is exactly what happened to me, and at this point when I realized that I lift more than most of the guys at the gym, I panicked. Suddenly I started to feel less feminine and sexy because seeing myself stronger than most of the guys placed me in front of them on that invisible weight lifting hierarchy ladder in my head. I’ve became one of the guys. Then I remembered:
My strength does not come from lifting weights, my strength came from lifting myself up when I was knocked down. [Tweet this!]
So how can you stay feminine and sexy on the inside while weight lifting?
3 tips to make you feel more feminine and sexy while weight lifting
Use these 3 tips to make you feel more feminine and sexy inside and outside of the gym while you regularly do your weight lifting routine.
Tip #1: Spend time with other women
Spending time in a gym weight lifting where most of the members are guys you are comparing yourself to and competing with is exhausting. All that manly energy and testosterone surrounding you while weight lifting may result in you ending up feeling less feminine and sexy.
What you need to do is get yourself among a group of women. By spending time with woman will make you unconsciously observe their feminine body language and movements, and after a few hours you will start to imitate them. Spending time with women will turn on your feminine side that you’ve put aside for weight lifting.
Tip #2: Be graceful
When out of the weight lifting room, make smooth movements instead of powerful ones!
You can teach yourself to be graceful and more feminine. Watch your posture: tighten your abs, move your shoulders down and back, away from your ears and raise your chin to be parallel to the floor.
To walk gracefully in heels or in any other type of shoes, do the following: take small steps, walk heel to toe not toe to heel. Don’t rush, lean slightly back while walking and visualize yourself walking in a straight line.
Tip #3: Dance
Dance classes are great for improving your feminine posture and teach you graceful movements. Just be sure to choose a dance class that requires you to learn sexy, feminine moves! It doesn’t have to be modern ballet, I suggest belly dancing, or my favorite, Zumba! After you learn the steps, you will be able to pay attention to your body movements in order for them to become calculated and fluid.
I was afraid of going alone to the gym as a girl. I was afraid of going alone to the “manly” section of the gym to start lifting weights. I remember planning to go to the gym alone for days. What occupied my mind was the moment when I’d step into the manly section of the gym to start my routine of lifting weights. I imagined that every person in the gym would look at me walking towards the weight rack, judging me. It was awful. It took me days to gather courage to actually go to the gym. But I wanted to go alone. I knew about the benefits of lifting weights for girls. I wanted to be that girl. The girl at the gym who is lifting weights.
Going to the gym alone to workout and start lifting weights can be intimidating for a girl. Here is a guide to get you on the road of going alone to the gym for the first time:
1. Pretend like you belong there
Fake it till you make it! Pretend like you know what you are doing. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t prepare yourself for your first time going alone to the gym. Pick out a workout plan that fits your level of fitness, know exactly what exercises you will be doing at the gym, in what order. Study the exercises you are about to do. Watch YouTube videos of proper forms of the exercises. Use the mirrors in the gym, they are there so you can check yourself and your form (and later to see your sexy body and flex your muscles!). Do everything that you feel like you need to do in order for you to feel ready for your first time going alone to the gym. Then just walk in and pretend like you belong there. Let me tell you a secret: chances are, the others are faking it as well. Also, don’t be afraid to stand around and stare at the equipment or look around to see if it is the machine you’re looking for.
2. Use warm up and cardio for making yourself comfortable
You need to warm up before engaging in any exercise activity. Use this time to calm your mind. If you are used to running, then use the treadmill to get your pulse up and watch other people around you. This will make you feel like you fit in with the gym locals. If your goal is to start lifting weights, then do what I did: use the weight room for warm up exercises so you can assess the situation before starting your lifting routine.
3. Have a workout plan
Know what you are there for. You surely have a goal set ahead of you (for choosing a goal, visit XXFitness FAQ). Whether it is losing weight and fat, gaining muscle and strength, improving your cardio and heart health or toning up your body, you will need a workout plan for it. Pick a workout plan in advance that works towards your goals. I started lifting weights with the Stronglifts 5×5 app, because having my phone with me at the gym and using the built-in timer for counting rest time between sets seemed like a good idea. Knowing that I can see the exercises on my phone gave me the courage to act like I knew what I was doing. Or you could just have pictures of exercises on your phone to remind yourself of the exercises you will be doing. Nowadays I just use 3 different post it notes with the exercises scribbled down with cute stick figures performing the exercise that I rotate on my 3-day workout days.
4. You are awesome for even thinking about going alone to the gym
If you’d have ever spent time in a gym, you’d seen that most people there are noobs. Not many people know what they are doing. So don’t be afraid to be one of the noobs. Everyone has to start somewhere. By having a workout goal and a workout plan, you are already in the scarce minority. Just look around among your friends: the reason of why you even thought of going alone in the gym in the first place is because there is no one around you to keep you company. So committing to going alone to the gym, you already placed yourself in the scarce minority of people that actually care about their lifestyle. Congratulations, by researching the proper form of exercises and attempting them you further narrowed yourself to make the awesome gym people cut!
Just remember: it takes one step at a time, and the first step is the hardest! Everyone at the gym had to start somewhere, so nobody in their right mind is going to judge you for being a beginner. Don’t worry, no one is there to watch you working out. At least not yet!
Found this guide useful? Get more useful quick tips on how to motivate yourself towards a lifestyle filled with healthy habits! Click here>>>
Lifting weights is not for women. You’ll look bulky with big muscles! It’s not womanly! These are just some of the bullsh!t women say when I mention that I started lifting weights. Me, a woman. Shame on me. It makes me scream at them that lifting weights won’t make a woman huge, because you are in fact a woman. But mostly I just say yeah, I look huge, right? When in fact I look fit and curvy in all the right places just like a woman should look, and I feel strong from lifting weights. I discovered that lifting weights as a woman can be fun and awesome! So why are women afraid of lifting weights?
While I was obese my goal was to lose weight to look healthy. Getting rid of fat and losing weight was a priority as a woman. I managed to go to overweight from obese and then lost more weight to finally hit the normal weight range for a woman. Achieving weight loss in a healthy way was also a priority and I noticed that I’ve not just lost weight and became thin from overweight but also thanks to regular exercising became a fit woman as well!
Overexercising is not good for consistent, healthy weight loss! [Tweet this!]
So I’ve changed my weight goals going lower and lower. The priority also shifted: it is not so much about losing weight anymore; it’s more about building muscle and paying attention so I don’t lose muscle mass while losing weight; but loose the remaining fat.
Now I am considered more muscular than the average woman out there. I never would have imagined that building muscle will be on my to do list! But having womanly muscles is awesome! And turns out I really enjoy having muscles: I love how carrying heavy grocery bags is not challenging anymore – I can carry them from the market to home easily! Getting six pack drinks and carrying them is also easy! And these are just the everyday benefits of being a muscular woman. I must admit that I secretly enjoy being the only woman in the weights sections of the gym. I let the others do cardio for hours and hours while I lift weights with men.
So why should every woman start lifting weights?
1. Get curvy body figure faster
You can have a fit body way faster with lifting weights than with doing cardio for hours and hours. Plus heavy cardio for more than 1 hour a day is not so healthy for you in the long run. You can easily achieve that desired womanly curvy body / six packs with lifting weights 3 times for an hour a week! So I switched from doing cardio 3 times a week to going to the gym lifting weights 3 times a week. Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy the zumba classes, and attend them once or twice a week – but I don’t overdo it like some of the women by combining 2 or 3 hours of exercise a day for looking good. It’s pointless to tire yourself that much. And who the hell has time to exercise for 2-3 hours every day in the long run??? (Lonely women, that’s who.)
2. Being a beast without looking like a beast
Lifting weights will tone your womanly body making it visually pleasing. Muscles only show when you flex them, so you will not look like a beast, trust me. It is a common misconception that lifting weights will make women look big and bulky.
In order to look like big men with bulky muscles, a woman would need to produce testosterone, eat the right things and take supplements. So it is a hard work to look like The Rock, it won’t happen if you don’t make an effort. Besides, women’s bodies do not produce testosterone required to get bulky, so you won’t have to be afraid that you’ll get big by lifting weights.
3. Eat more and still look good
Good news for all you women out there who like to eat: with lifting weights, you can still look good and eat! Of course you have to eat healthy, but using your muscles uses up strength, so you will need to eat after lifting weights. You will need to eat real food, and eat enough of it. Your muscles will need protein!
Lifting weights as a woman has made me looking sexier than ever! Curves all around! You don’t have to be afraid that lifting weights will make you look like a pro body builder with huge muscles – in order to look like a pro body builder, you really have to want to look like that, eat like a beast with a specific diet in order to build that unnatural muscle mass.
Remember: it’s not how much you exercise; the secret is to do it smart![Tweet this!]
So, you want to look damn good and still be strong? Start lifting weights, woman! Get inspired on your fitness journey by clicking here >>>
When I started my weight loss journey never would I have guessed that the hardest part of becoming fit would be accepting mentally my newly sculpted body and its body image! Get 3 great tips and 2 easy exercises that will help you accept your new fit body and overcome the mental obstacle of that fat body image in your head.
I struggled with not seeing the weight loss change my body image in the mirror. I saw the numbers on the scale getting lower and lower, my pants being too big, but I just could not see this change affecting the body image in the mirror. In my mind I was still a fat girl instead of a fit one, no matter what friends and family said about me having a fit body.
Then as the weight loss continued, the feeling of my mind being out of sync with my body image grew stronger and stronger. I felt like an alien in my new fit body, and it was unbearable.
I even considered getting psychiatric help for my body image issues, because it was driving me crazy to live in a body that is considered fit and smaller in size than what I was always used to having – being obese and overweight my whole life. I even thought of stopping the exercises and start eating more, just to get back to my old, big body image size.
Luckily for me, my basic motivation for losing weight was to start and maintain a healthy lifestyle, and not mainly to get a good looking fit body.
Moving back to obese-city is not an option I could see myself being satisfied with again. [Tweet this!]
So I started to search online for help with my body image issues, but could not find anything that would directly help me. People would mention in their weight loss success stories that they still can’t see themselves as thin, or that they are not used to their body image, but that was it. No mentions on how to address this issue of fat body image existing only in your head.
3 tips to help You see Your fit body image after weight loss
Therapists and medical doctors didn’t take me seriously and said that this body image problem will solve itself, and that the fat body image goes away after a while. I tried many things to speed this process up, and here is a list of 3 things that will help you accept your new fit body:
1. Boost low self confidence
Body image issues arise from the fact that your brain has not accepted the image of your new fit body. During your weigh loss you were dissatisfied with your overweight body and fat body parts. This dissatisfaction leads to low self confidence, even when you’ve lost all that fat. So what you need to do is start boosting your self confidence in order to accept your new fit body image.
Here are tips on how to boost low self confidence after weight loss and accept your fit body image:
Put a photo of yourself on the fridge or another visible place where you think you look better than perfect and look at it often. This helps your mind connect to the fit body image that you see on the picture.
Take pictures of your body now after your weight loss & compare them to old pictures of yourself. This way the fake fat body image that you are holding on to in your mind and the real fit body image that you actually have now are being compared. It will help you see the changes that your mind did not see on your body before.
Get yourself a pair of skinny jeans or colored pants that make you keep thinking “Girl, you are hot!”. This will help your mind to start seeing how the weight loss changed the bottom part of your body.
Go window shopping! Pick something out that you would never have dared to wear while being overweight and try it on just for the fun of it! You will be surprised by how good your new fit body can look with the proper size of clothing!
2. Check for input from other people
People around me noticed my weight loss and positive changes about my body way sooner than I have. It was annoying for a while to address their compliments and answer their questions about my fit body, and I hated it. But looking back now I see that their comments and questions helped me a lot with my mental barriers of accepting my new fit body. Here is how you can ask friends or a significant other to help you with your body image problems:
Ask someone you absolutely trust what they think about your looks after the weight loss – you might not trust the image in the mirror, but if a friend or significant other points out that your body is actually fit and you are not fat anymore, it is way more likely to stick with you.
Ask a friend or your significant other to point out someone from a crowd of people who has a similar body size as you – trust me, it will surprise you! Seeing other people who are similar to you in size will not trigger an emotional response as seeing a picture of yourself would, therefore it’s helping you rationalize your new body size.
When receiving a positive comment on your new body image from other people, don’t ignore or dismiss – it’s bad manners and you come off as being rude. Don’t try to shy away from compliments about your looks: say thank you for the compliments! Chances are that the other person sees something positive regarding your body size and lower weight that you don’t see.
3. Quick 10 minute exercises for accepting your new body
You can try both Exercise A and Exercise B to see which one suits you best, and then continue with the one you are more comfortable with. Or you can switch them up, and one day do Exercise A and on other days Exercise B. The trick is to do them for at least a week, and soon you’ll be able to see your fit body image in the mirror, and not just the fat self.
Exercise A: Walk in the dark with closed eyes
You will need to rely on your other senses in order to navigate yourself. It connects the mental image that you have of your body with the real life body of yours. During this exercise you will need to work with the body you currently have, and not the image of the body that is imprinted in your subconscious. Do this for 10 minutes a day, and you will see improvements in sensing your whole body.
Exercise B: Backward walking
It works similar to the previous exercise, without closing your eyes. It is challenging to walk backwards because backward walking eliminates the typical heel-strike to the ground – the toe contacts the ground first. It is not just a simple physical activity, it requires brain activity as well. Plus it keeps you stay mentally sharp, puts your senses into overdrive, and it enhances vision as well. You’ll see all these benefits on your mental body image with a 10 minute walk a day for five weeks.
It was these last two exercises (Exercise A and Exercise B) that truly helped me accept my new fit body image.
Looking at old pictures of myself helped too, but it made me overly emotional, so usually I was trying to avoid to look at my old obese and later overweight pictures of myself. Input of friends was useful in seeing the body I had in reality in my mind, because they pointed out things about my body that I hadn’t noticed. A friend I always considered beautiful and good looking with a fit body said to me: “Look at your tummy, it is flatter than mine!” This was a major game changer for me.
Need more help seeing your new fit body image in the mirror? Get more tips by clicking here >>>