Tag Archives: weight loss struggles

How people treat You differently after Your weight loss

Body image problems, Emotional issues after weight loss, , , , ,

Getting fit and losing weight affects not just your looks and attitude but also the perception of how others around you see you. There will be a change in people’s attitudes towards the new, fit you.

Part of the changed view of you comes from the fact that your looks have changed, and that change in your body becomes noticeable at a first glance to others. This is why you are drawing the wanted or unwanted attention of your friends and acquaintances. You may find this to be pleasing, and it can even give you a temporary boost in motivation to workout harder. On the other hand, if you are like me, you will find all this sudden rush of attention unwelcome and have mixed feelings about people who unexpectedly shower you with compliments, and struggle with finding the best way to deal with all that sincere or false openness. Whatever your reaction is, one thing is sure: people will treat you differently after your weight loss.

Let’s see how the different types of people around you will treat you after your weight loss:

  1. Family and relatives

Family could be supportive of your attempts to build yourself a healthy life. However, if obesity runs in your family, then family and relatives will be opposed of your lifestyle changes. It will seem that your family wants you to keep your past identity of being overweight and out of shape. Relatives will not see your hard work behind you looking fit and healthy. Don’t expect to get support from family, as they will only see that you’ve gone too far, and as you are now unhealthily thin. You can try to persuade them otherwise, and can spend hours of talking about being happy and healthy, and present them with facts of how this is a normal weight range for your age and height on the body mass index (BMI) chart, they will stay skeptic. Family members could even criticize or try to disrupt your fitness undertakings in order to maintain stability in the family. An overweight child has a specific role in the family – he or she deflects attention from other issues there are in the family, so by losing weight and becoming fit disturbs the whole usual flow in the family and its members.

As we know, change is hard. But inevitable.

You can frustrate yourself over this (like I did), or choose to accept that you recognized how you’ve led an unhealthy lifestyle and now you’ve taken charge of it to change it for the better.

  1. Coworkers or classmates

Coworkers and classmates are the ones who see you every day of the workweek, and since you spend so much time with them, they will be the first to notice changes in your body. However, because you were identified as someone who is overweight and out of shape for years, when you get fit, the balance changes – they may start to feel threatened.

They will start to be jealous of your new fit body, and start commenting your success. The other option is that they will start to feel guilty because they’ve let themselves get out of shape and now the tables have turned and you are the sexy one in the office/classroom.

I work with women who were considered really hot back when I was obese. Fast forward a few years: I started lifting weights, they gained weight. Now the tables have turned – I am the one with the fit body. I try not to bring it up, but boy, they are jealous. You can see their faces lightning up with envy whenever someone walks into the office and comments on my new found good looks. But then again, they could use the stairs instead of the elevator too. Plus they shouldn’t have pizza for breakfast every morning.

  1. Boyfriend or husband or a significant other

    "I love you more now that we are thin!"
    “I love you more now that we are thin!”

People tend to get involved with a partner who’s attractiveness is alike. So if you are overweight, chances are that your significant other is also on the bigger side. If you are lucky, you are on your journey to slim town together, so you have each others’ support and are going through the lifestyle change together. If this is not the case, and only you decided to lose weight, it slowly generates tension in your relationship. The other party will start to feel threatened when their partner becomes more attractive to the opposite sex. It will also produce a sense of inadequacy. This is exactly what breeds small fights, and can lead to serious problems in the relationship that are very hard to overcome. Yet again, both parties need to change: if you’ve changed on the outside, your partner will need to change on the outside too or on the inside in order to deal with the changes that your healthy lifestyle brings. Your best bet is to face the changes together, and develop a life with a healthy diet and exercise together that will benefit the both of you.

  1. Exes

The satisfaction you feel when meeting your ex about yourself and your weight loss is equally proportional to the amount of the drama you two had breaking up.

If weight was an issue in your past relationship, the guilty, dirty pleasure gets multiplied. That said, this is not a healthy attitude to have and you should not strive to motivate yourself to lose weight for your ex (either to get back to them or to get them back).

Do your workout because you want it and need it for yourself, and not for anyone else!

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  1. Jealous friends

    "She looks hotter than me now that she's not fat"
    “Damn, she looks hotter than me now that she’s not fat anymore”

Loosing weight by changing your lifestyle comes with gaining a bunch of self confidence. So be prepared that you might loose a best friend when you get high self esteem if it was based on low self esteem issues. Just remember that you are the one that changed, not your friends – so if they are judging your new appearance, it means that they were always so judgmental. It’s just that when you were heavy, they never said anything to your face because they were ashamed to show their judgement in front of you.  They are jealous of your achievements because now they feel insecure when they are around you. Their jealousy and resentment towards you is a reflection of their own insecurities and lack of self esteem they are projecting on you.

  1. Supportive friends

If a friend shows no difference in how they treat you now that you are fit and before you were heavier, it means that you chose wisely about friends that you keep around you. A supportive friend reinforces the positive changes that his or her friend makes. You should look for friends like this. Just keep in mind: successful and fulfilling friendships are a two-way street.

So however people might treat you differently after your weight loss, you need to remember that you got fit for yourself. You are doing it all for yourself, and not your ex, boyfriend or to make girlfriends jealous! Many things in your life changed after your drastic weight loss, and almost all of them were positive. Find a motivation to stay fit for yourself, and start caring less about what others think of your new fit body. Especially since what other people think of you is none of your business!

Found this useful? Get more tips on how to motivate yourself towards a lifestyle full of healthy habits! Click here>>>

5 types of people You’ll encounter after losing weight 2

5 types of people You’ll encounter after losing weight

Body image problems, Motivation to stay fit, , , , ,

Hitting the healthy weight chart on the BMI chart for women is a challenge for itself. You avoid certain types of foods to help you lose weight, exercise regularly, count your caloric intake, change your whole life around to have a healthy living, motivate yourself. Finally you get to a healthy weight, look awesome and fit with muscles from all that hard exercise, start dressing differently because all your old donated clothing is now a part of a new wardrobe of a homeless.

5 types of people You’ll encounter after losing weight 1
Me&my jealous friends
Image source

That’s when friends, coworkers and acquaintances start noticing your new found body. They will feel like it is time for them to compliment you on your achievements. They will be thrilled about your success, because you’ve accomplished what they are just hoping to achieve one day. As may it be fascinating for you at first to hear the compliments, you will grow tired of them soon after. Especially when you realize that what they say is actually a reflection of their own biases, self-doubt and flaws.

Soon you’ll recognize that there are just 5 type of people that you’ll encounter after losing weight:

1. The Thrilled

The Thrilled are just soooooo happy for you now! It’s like you were invisible for them back in your fat days. It is a bit creepy that after all that time of ignoring or just saying the obligatory hello the Thrilled are now giving you more attention than your significant other and telling you how great you look. Makes you wonder if they thought that you were an ugly obese before.  Why the heck none of them ever bothered to bring that to your attention?

5 types of people You’ll encounter after losing weight 3
I am also eating a healthy balanced diet! Want a lick?
Image source

People you don’t know very well or who never even bothered to talk to you before will feel completely entitled to comment on your weight loss. [Tweet this!]

“Before” is unacceptable to them and the “after”, the new you,  is to be congratulated and praised.

Tip: If you get tired of talking only about your weight loss success, take control of the situation and change the topic. Maybe you will find out that they are not so bad after all, and become new best buddies with the Thrilled.

 2. The Critics

The Critics will analyze everything that you are doing. They are like a judging mother: asking you if you eat regularly, stating that you are too skinny, give unwanted advice. They will ask you why you are not dressing a certain way, why you are eating what you are eating, and even ask if you are sure you are not sick.

3. The Rude Critics

The Rude Critics struggle with weight and self-confidence themselves. Your looks make them uncomfortable, so they will deal with this the only way they know how. So they will either start avoiding you, or those with a messed up mind will tell you how they can’t stand looking at you like this:

5 types of people You’ll encounter after losing weight 2
“You look awful, put on some weight please!”
Image source

“I can’t stand looking at you like this, put on some weight please!”

or

“I can’t stand seeing you like this, you don’t look like yourself anymore!”

They just want to hurt you, because they feel humiliated and are embarrassed about themselves. Don’t forget that these are trying times for them, so if you are not able to resolve the conflict coolly and rationally, then it is best for you to take some time apart from the criticizers.

Rude Critics want to embarrass and hurt others to build their self-esteem.

4. The Followers

The Followers will share your success story with everyone around them! They do this because they are really proud that you finally lost weight and got fit looking. You’ll feel a bit proud of yourself, but after awhile it will become annoying that your Followers want to be in the spotlight with your success.

5. The Admirers

The Admirers will want to know your secret, and they won’t believe that it is all hard work. They will think that you have magic beans or potion to make you physically fit, thin and awesome looking in an instant!

Tip: They are the easiest to get rid of: just tell them that if they want to look like you, they should focus on their healthy diet and training – they will instantly lose interest.

These are all types of people that knew the overweight “before”  you. People you meet “after” you lose lots of weight will treat you differently than what you are used to, because they don’t know the fat you. Slowly you will get used to that too.

Find out how people will treat you differently after your weight loss! Click here>>>

How to stay motivated & stick to Your fitness routine

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We’ve all had those days when we are more likely to tell ourselves that we are way too tired to go the gym or attend that one hour pilates class. You had a rough day at work, the dog needs a walk, those dishes won’t do themselves… I immediately start to feel depressed and my minimal motivation is gone.

F**k it, I'm just gonna sleep
F**k it, I’m just gonna sleep Image copyright

Slacking would be really easy in these situations. However, consider the fact that skipping can ruin your achievements. Know this: skipping one routine does not ruin your overall progress. But if you do it at the start of your weightloss journey, before you’ve seen results of your dedicated work, then it will set you back in your progress.

Tips to make You stick to a fitness program

You’ve lost all that weight. You made a commitment to change your life around. Came up with a plan, acted according to it and the results are in! Your body is thin and fit! You achieved what everyone – including you – thought was impossible to achieve!

What really mattered and made a difference was not that initial decision – what made you successful is consistency. Coming up with a plan and sticking to it – it is the key to achieving your goal. This consistency in workout routine is where most people fail. They stick to their new fitness routine for awhile and when it becomes harder because it interferes with other parts of their lives or they just get bored, they stop. Then it is all downhill from there. If you miss a pilates class just once because you didn’t feel like/couldn’t make time for exercising, next time you’ll be more likely to skip because there are more important things to do. Your workout routine gets ruined slowly.

Until workout becomes a routine and a habit you must go to that pilates, yoga, aerobic, etc. class according to your plan! [Tweet this!]

Going to the fitness gym when you don’t feel like it or when it feels hard is part of your journey – overcoming those feelings and still going builds character – it builds the new you from the inside. This does not just strengthen your new body, it strengthens the new you: your mind and soul as well.

3 hacks to stay motivated going to the gym when you don’t feel like going

  1. Get dressed first and then decide if You want to go or not

    get dressed first
    Barbie has themost stylish workout outfits everImage copyright

Put on your favorite fitness T-shirt and your greatest workout pants! Aim for an outfit that both looks good and feels comfortable. It is more likely that you attend your workout if you are already dressed for it. Works every time!

  1. The 3 second rule: the more time You think about it the more likely it is that You will not do it

The secret is not to over think it. So when the thought of skipping the daily exercise comes into mind, stop thinking and start acting! Make the first steps towards going: fill up your water bottle, pack your towel, get your running shoes out. Make the first steps – ACT!

  1. Talk to Your supporter/workout partner about skipping Your daily routine

If you have friend who is supporting you or an exercise partner, let them know that you are planning to skip an exercise so they can scold you, so you’ll change your mind about not going. Sounds childish, but stating out loud why you don’t wanna go and hearing it might make you change your mind about it. Plus having someone who supports you, a friend, a significant other, family member, coach is important in keeping your routine.

You had to make sacrifices to get the dream body – so just go and exercise! Next time you’re demotivated to workout just give these hacks a try! Or you can keep yourself motivated by getting more tips:

Interested in facts about your body after weight loss? Click here to find out more>>>

The struggle with body image distortion after weight loss

Body image problems, Emotional issues after weight loss, , , , , , , ,
The struggle with body image distortion after weight loss
You’ve won the battle – time to enjoy!
Image copyright 
You’ve lost significant weight. You have become healthier and stronger.
The body you see in the mirror is everything you ever wanted.

But it still feels strange? Still surprised when you see a photo of yourself?
We offer tips for accepting this new you.

Get 9 great tips to help with mental obstacles with your body image

The biggest struggle wasn’t losing all those pounds as you thought it would be, because once you change your habits and introduce regularity in your life, it’s all easy as a pie. The real disturbance is what you’re experiencing now, after the weight loss: the image of a body you see in the mirror staring back at you feels foreign. It looks good, attractive, but it is not you.

You thought that with losing weight you will gain a higher level of self confidence and a healthy level of self-esteem. You were wrong. You are more self aware than ever before.

You are used to watching beautiful bodies everywhere around you and wishing you had that flat tummy/toned arms/defined thighs/sexy booty. That’s what get you started on your journey towards healthy weight. But now you can’t believe you already did it – your body looks good! You thought you’ll never have that body, but now it’s yours. But the biggest problem you face now is accepting it. You are used to being overweight, it is familiar, and you learned to live with it.

Why am I dissatisfied with my body after weight loss?

Weight loss in itself is a major life change, much like getting married or moving to another country.
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Especially if the weight loss happened fast: your brain and your neurons are not as quick catching up to your new persona as your body is changing. The older you are the harder it is. Children are freely accepting changes in their bodies because they are still laying down images and views of themselves. Your view of yourself is more deep-seated when you become an adult, so it can be difficult to resolve changes with who you are as a person. This is due to the fact that the person you think you are is tied in to the body that you have. So body image after weight loss becomes a troubling and confusing experience.

A holistic approach sees this psychological trauma of being fat in the past as a disorder in the energy field. Everyone who ever experienced being shaped differently in the past go through this.

Acceptance of the problem

Also, you are used to focus on the negative things, the things that draw your attention and make you go “Ugh” about yourself. That’s exactly what kept motivating you throughout your voyage to Slim Town.

The struggle with body image distortion after weight loss
She runs everyone over on her way to Slim Town.
Image copyright

So the first step is to admit that you have a problem with accepting the new you. You might not even be aware of it yet; it might just come to you as a seldom thought when you see your reflection. Your mind can’t make the connection. That reflection is not you, it can’t be: You are bigger than that; your thighs are wider; your belly is huge and looks like a beach ball. That mirror is lying to you. Then a friend notices the change, and tells you that you look great. You don’t believe them. Then other friends and family notice that too and compliment you on your looks.

First you think they are lying; then you start doubting yourself and your judgment. Then you start looking for your reflection and start seeing what they are talking about

But that new body is you, however your brain has not caught up with the weight loss yet.

How to overcome body image issues

Having the body of your dreams is new: your mind will need time to accept it. It will happen in time, I assure you there is nothing wrong with your mental health. How to speed up the process of your brain accepting your new body image? Here are my tips:

  1. Put a photo of yourself on the fridge or another visible place where you think you look better than perfect
  2. Get yourself a pair of skinny jeans or colored pants that make you keep thinking “Girl, you are small!”
  3. Take pictures now & compare them to old pictures
  4. Ask a friend or a significant other you absolutely trust what they think about your looks after the weight loss
  5. Look yourself in the mirror while you work out and compare the body you see with other bodies in the gym
  6. Go window shopping! Pick something out that you would never have dared to wear before and try it on just for the fun of it!
  7. Try on your old over-sized clothes! This way you will get a clear perspective of your progress and your current body size.
  8. Ask a friend or your significant other to point out someone from a crowd of people who has a similar body size as you. You’ll be surprised! Also, seeing other people who are similar to you in size will not trigger the same emotional response as seeing a picture of yourself would, therefore it’s helping you rationalize your new body size.
  9. When getting a positive comment on your new body from others, don’t ignore it or dismiss it. It’s a bad manner and you come off as being rude. Say thank you for the compliments! You’ve just earned somebody’s respect and admiration. After all, you’ve worked hard for it, right? So don’t try to shy away from compliments about your looks. The other person sees something regarding your body size and lower weight that you don’t.

For best results, do all of the above!

Accept responsibility for your own success!  See your body for as it is – don’t allow your old fat identity to ruin the new you!

You have problems dealing with your new body image? Share your story in the comments section!

Interested in facts about your body after weight loss? Click here to find out more>>>