“Stop losing weight, you are too thin!” is the sentence I keep hearing day after day from friends, co-workers and acquaintances I meet. Let me share with you 5 different situations I have to face fit shaming during a regular week and the lessons I’ve learned during those encounters with the good intention bullies.
Fit shaming situations and lessons I’ve learned
Day #1:

It is a beautiful Monday morning and I am heading towards my office while taking the stairs (like always since I’ve changed my lifestyle to a healthy one). The only one taking the stairs this morning (and on other mornings) with me is one girl who works on the 1st floor and recently got into heavy cardio workout 3 times per week. While we chitchat about it’s being Monday already, I suddenly hear her say the dreaded sentence:
“Stop losing weight, you are too thin!”
Instead of ignoring it this time while thinking how Mondays hate me too I reply with a brand new well-prepared answer for these situations I haven’t tried saying and failing before:
“I am 58kg/128lbs! I don’t believe that’s thin for my height (163cm/5 ft 4 in)!”
Her reply:
“Well, it is too thin!”
Lesson #1:
I can’t win with these people.
Day #2:
Stressful day at the office, being busy. Suddenly an ex co-worker drops by to say hi. She recognizes that this is not a good time for chitchat, so she cuts it short. She is already at the door, almost opening it, when casually instead of “Goodbye”she drops the bomb:
“Don’t lose more weight, you’ll disappear!”

It is not her first time bringing this to my attention, I see her a few times a month, so it’s not like she hasn’t seen me fit. But today is the day that I choose to reply to her comment.
“I am not thin, look at all my muscles! I am 58kg/128lbs!”
She turns back, approaches me and tells me that 58kg/128lbs is almost nothing. So to prove my point of me being in a normal weight range for my height, I ask her how much does she weight.
She tells me: “You are not a woman if you are under 60kg! I weight 63kg!” and she leaves in a hurry, leaving me standing there and calculating in my head her BMI. She is way taller than I am (175cm) so if she weights 63kg it makes her BMI 20,6 which is lower than my BMI of 21,8. Yet, it’s still me, who is being bullied into not being a real woman because of her low weight.
Lesson #2:
I am being bullied about my weight by other women now that I am fit. While being obese, none of the women around me asked, mentioned or made rude remarks about my weight.
Day #3:
Running errands on a usual weekday when I bump into an old friend of mine. After a few sentences on how our lives are currently, she leans closer, lowers her voice and asks:
“What do you do to look thin like this?”
It’s like she’s expecting me to give her a well guarded secret that I somehow came across during my weight loss journey. I lean closer to her and say in a calm voice how I changed my nutrition, I eat healthy, I eat less, I regularly exercise.
“Oh, I see. I can’t do that. I don’t have time to workout. / I like cake too much. (*insert here a long list of personal excuses*)”
Lesson #3:
People say that they want to know my secret of how I’ve lost weight and became fit, when in reality they just want to hear that there is an easy way for them to do it that they haven’t heard of yet. The moment they figure out that it is discipline and hard work, they become uninterested.
Day #4:
Leaving my office for a lunch break when I meet a co-worker on the stairs going in the opposite direction. We say hi, I compliment her looks and she notices that we have matching pants! She complains about the pants getting too baggy after only two wears and I say that mine are fine. Then she looks at me from head to toe and says:
“Oh my god, look at you! You are so thin! I am not talking to you anymore!” says jokingly and leaves me there standing alone on the stairs.
Lesson #4:
If there is a grain of truth in every joke, I wonder if some women really stopped talking to me and started avoiding me out of envy after I’ve lost weight and became fit.
Day #5:
 At the office again, having a coffee break (or in my case: green tea break) with my female co-workers. One of them says:
At the office again, having a coffee break (or in my case: green tea break) with my female co-workers. One of them says:
“Oh you are so thin! I can see on your face that you’ve lost weight!”
Today I’m trying out a new reply strategy, so I say:
“Thank you, I get that a lot! In fact, I get called thin every day!”
Suddenly one of my other co-workers, who is trying to lose weight herself by occasionally going on strict diets turns to me and says:
“Really? I bet your family thinks that you are too thin.” she adds.
“No, it’s not my family, they accepted the new fit me. Women around me point out every day how thin I am.”
Lesson #5:
People have no idea that fit shaming even exists. Even the woman who fit shame me are not aware of the fact that they are acting like a bully. They would never call their obese co-worker fat or obese, yet they are without a second thought calling me thin.
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		 After significant weight loss, friends, coworkers and acquaintances will start noticing your new found body. They will feel like it is time for them to compliment you on your new fit body. How can you accept these compliments without being rude or seeming awkward?
After significant weight loss, friends, coworkers and acquaintances will start noticing your new found body. They will feel like it is time for them to compliment you on your new fit body. How can you accept these compliments without being rude or seeming awkward?

 
		




 
		 Imagine this scenario: family gathering, family members sitting around the table stuffed with food, eating. Then suddenly grandma turns to you and says:
Imagine this scenario: family gathering, family members sitting around the table stuffed with food, eating. Then suddenly grandma turns to you and says:

 
		 Remember how I’ve had problems
Remember how I’ve had problems  As it feels awesome to be able to carry my own groceries, it feels strange to look in the mirror at the gym to see muscles on my body where there used to be fat. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have manly muscles, because a woman can’t just get muscular like that with no additional work. I have nice, visible muscles, that give my whole fit body a more feminine look. I look like a girl-beast only when I flex my muscles (joking). My tummy is flat and my abs are visible for the first time in my life! So it’s pretty fun to look at my new fit body in the mirror, but yet again I feel like my mind has not caught up to the fit body I have in reality. I see myself in the mirror, I know it’s me, but that fit body that is looking back at me from the mirror surely isn’t my body, because I am not so fit and muscular.
As it feels awesome to be able to carry my own groceries, it feels strange to look in the mirror at the gym to see muscles on my body where there used to be fat. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have manly muscles, because a woman can’t just get muscular like that with no additional work. I have nice, visible muscles, that give my whole fit body a more feminine look. I look like a girl-beast only when I flex my muscles (joking). My tummy is flat and my abs are visible for the first time in my life! So it’s pretty fun to look at my new fit body in the mirror, but yet again I feel like my mind has not caught up to the fit body I have in reality. I see myself in the mirror, I know it’s me, but that fit body that is looking back at me from the mirror surely isn’t my body, because I am not so fit and muscular. 
		



 
		

 Don’t worry, you can take time off your workout routine while injured or sick, and still be able to maintain your form.  No matter how much muscle or strength you lose while laying in your bed injured or sick, you will gain it back much faster than it took you to gain it at the first place. This is just one of the reasons why
Don’t worry, you can take time off your workout routine while injured or sick, and still be able to maintain your form.  No matter how much muscle or strength you lose while laying in your bed injured or sick, you will gain it back much faster than it took you to gain it at the first place. This is just one of the reasons why  
		

 
		 Enjoying your summer holiday it is almost impossible to watch what you eat and keeping it only healthy meals and watch you weight while being away from home. If you travel abroad, there will be the temptation of trying all those delicious and yummy local specialties you just can’t miss out! If you are lucky, they will be healthy foods, exotic fruits that you can enjoy without feeling remorse. However, if you are unlucky like me, the delicacies you try while on your summer holiday will mostly be on the unhealthy but delicious side of the food pyramid. This means that by indulging in new meal specialties during your summer get away will have an impact on your weight.
Enjoying your summer holiday it is almost impossible to watch what you eat and keeping it only healthy meals and watch you weight while being away from home. If you travel abroad, there will be the temptation of trying all those delicious and yummy local specialties you just can’t miss out! If you are lucky, they will be healthy foods, exotic fruits that you can enjoy without feeling remorse. However, if you are unlucky like me, the delicacies you try while on your summer holiday will mostly be on the unhealthy but delicious side of the food pyramid. This means that by indulging in new meal specialties during your summer get away will have an impact on your weight.
 
		

