All posts by Christina Marky

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weight

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weight

Body image problems, Emotional issues after weight loss, Motivation to stay fit, , , ,

“Stop losing weight, you are too thin!” is the sentence I keep hearing day after day from friends, co-workers and acquaintances I meet. Let me share with you 5 different situations I have to face fit shaming during a regular week and the lessons I’ve learned during those encounters with the good intention bullies.

Fit shaming situations and lessons I’ve learned

Day #1:

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weight
More people in my office building would use the stairs if we had one of these escalators.

It is a beautiful Monday morning and I am heading towards my office while taking the stairs (like always since I’ve changed my lifestyle to a healthy one). The only one taking the stairs this morning (and on other mornings) with me is one girl who works on the 1st floor and recently got into heavy cardio workout 3 times per week. While we chitchat about it’s being Monday already, I suddenly hear her say the dreaded sentence:

“Stop losing weight, you are too thin!”

Instead of ignoring it this time while thinking how Mondays hate me too I reply with a brand new well-prepared answer for these situations I haven’t tried saying and failing before:

“I am 58kg/128lbs! I don’t believe that’s thin for my height (163cm/5 ft 4 in)!”

Her reply:

“Well, it is too thin!”

Lesson #1:

I can’t win with these people.

 

Day #2:

Stressful day at the office, being busy. Suddenly an ex co-worker drops by to say hi. She recognizes that this is not a good time for chitchat, so she cuts it short. She is already at the door, almost opening it, when casually instead of “Goodbye”she drops the bomb:

“Don’t lose more weight, you’ll disappear!”

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weight
This is how I imagined a stressful day at the office when I didn’t work in an office.

It is not her first time bringing this to my attention, I see her a few times a month, so it’s not like she hasn’t seen me fit. But today is the day that I choose to reply to her comment.

“I am not thin, look at all my muscles! I am 58kg/128lbs!”

She turns back, approaches me and tells me that 58kg/128lbs is almost nothing. So to prove my point of me being in a normal weight range for my height, I ask her how much does she weight.

She tells me: “You are not a woman if you are under 60kg! I weight 63kg!” and she leaves in a hurry, leaving me standing there and calculating in my head her BMI. She is way taller than I am (175cm) so if she weights 63kg it makes her BMI 20,6 which is lower than my BMI of 21,8. Yet, it’s still me, who is being bullied into not being a real woman because of her low weight.

Lesson #2:

I am being bullied about my weight by other women now that I am fit. While being obese, none of the women around me asked, mentioned or made rude remarks about my weight.

 

Day #3:

Running errands on a usual weekday when I bump into an old friend of mine. After a few sentences on how our lives are currently, she leans closer, lowers her voice and asks:

“What do you do to look thin like this?”

It’s like she’s expecting me to give her a well guarded secret that I somehow came across during my weight loss journey. I lean closer to her and say in a calm voice how I changed my nutrition, I eat healthy, I eat less, I regularly exercise.

“Oh, I see. I can’t do that. I don’t have time to workout. / I like cake too much. (*insert here a long list of personal excuses*)”

Lesson #3:

People say that they want to know my secret of how I’ve lost weight and became fit, when in reality they just want to hear that there is an easy way for them to do it that they haven’t heard of yet. The moment they figure out that it is discipline and hard work, they become uninterested.

 

Day #4:

Leaving my office for a lunch break when I meet a co-worker on the stairs going in the opposite direction. We say hi, I compliment her looks and she notices that we have matching pants! She complains about the pants getting too baggy after only two wears and I say that mine are fine. Then she looks at me from head to toe and says:

“Oh my god, look at you! You are so thin! I am not talking to you anymore!” says jokingly and leaves me there standing alone on the stairs.

Lesson #4:

If there is a grain of truth in every joke, I wonder if some women really stopped talking to me and started avoiding me out of envy after I’ve lost weight and became fit.

 

Day #5:

How not to deal with fit shaming people after losing weightAt the office again, having a coffee break (or in my case: green tea break) with my female co-workers. One of them says:

“Oh you are so thin! I can see on your face that you’ve lost weight!”

Today I’m trying out a new reply strategy, so I say:

“Thank you, I get that a lot! In fact, I get called thin every day!”

Suddenly one of my other co-workers, who is trying to lose weight herself by occasionally going on strict diets turns to me and says:

“Really? I bet your family thinks that you are too thin.” she adds.

“No, it’s not my family, they accepted the new fit me. Women around me point out every day how thin I am.”

Lesson #5:

People have no idea that fit shaming even exists. Even the woman who fit shame me are not aware of the fact that they are acting like a bully. They would never call their obese co-worker fat or obese, yet they are without a second thought calling me thin.

Interested in more tips on living a healthy life? Click here for my weekly updates>>>

How to avoid turning into a masculine beast when weight training?

How to avoid turning into a masculine beast when weight training?

Emotional issues after weight loss, Motivation to stay fit, , , , , 
How to avoid turning into a masculine beast when weight training?You've seen woman in the weight training section of the gym lift heavy. They look strong, confident, awesome. I've also seen muscular woman in the weight training part of the gym giving away strong masculine vibes. So it made me wonder: what is it about weight training that makes some woman more feminine and shine with confidence while turning other woman into a masculine man figure with a strong toned body?

Is it the heavy weights that make woman bulky when weight training?

I’ve seen girls in the gym who avoid the weight training section and use only light weights because they are afraid of becoming too bulky. And I’ve seen girls in the gym who occupy the squat rack when weight training and are not afraid to lift heavy. In fact, they enjoy weight training. They know that weight training as a woman won’t give you a manly body, just good looking toned muscles.

How to avoid turning into a masculine beast when weight training?There’s that great myth about weight training that weight training as a woman will make you appear bulky and manly. Click here to read more about this myth>>>

Testosterone is what makes a body look bulky. It is a male hormone. For woman,  weight training helps add bone density, which prevents osteoporosis. Weight training also improves muscle mass, which is good for the overall fitness level.

So it’s definitely not the weight training and heavy weights that you lift regularly that turn you into a manly woman with bulky muscles and a manly walk.

However, I’ve also seen girls at the gym who have an awesome and toned muscular body, and give away manly vibes.

What is it that makes weight training woman looking and acting manly?

How to avoid turning into a masculine beast when weight training?
Don’t let the short hair fool you: this is a woman acting manly.

Lifting heavy certainly does not make weight training woman look and act manly.

Weight training just tones your body making it visually more pleasing. Defined muscles will only show when you flex them. It is a common misconception that weight training makes women look big and bulky.

But how can you avoid turning into a manly beast as a woman while weight training?

In order to look like big men with bulky muscles, a woman would need to produce testosterone, eat the right things and take the necessary supplements. So it is a hard work to look like The Rock, it won’t happen if you don’t make an effort. Besides, women’s bodies does not produce testosterone required to get bulky, so you won’t have to be afraid that you’ll get big by doing weight training.

However, going to the gym regularly and spending your free time among sweaty men smelling all that testosterone around you and looking at them walk might make you unconsciously mimic their behavior.

5 tips on what to do if you feel like you’ve lost your femininity while weight training

Here are some tips if you don’t want to walk and act manly after spending too much time at the gym weight training:

#1. Engage in creative leisure activities

How to avoid turning into a masculine beast when weight training?Sometimes weight training can become boring, no matter how challenging it is for your body. If you feel like your missing creativity in your life, do something about it. Reach to your inner creativity: write a poem, hand made your jewellery, paint a silk scarf or a painting. Any activity that uses your creativity will instantly make you feel more girly.

# 2. Yoga

How to avoid turning into a masculine beast when weight training?Doing yoga will not only benefit your health, increase your flexibility, make you sleep better, fix your posture, tone your muscles, affect your weight loss (and I could go on for ages), but it is also a good for stretching your new built muscles. I noticed that when I combine yoga and weight training, my muscles are less stiff. Adding yoga to your weight training helps you get better shaped muscles. The gentleness of yoga awakens your inner woman.

# 3. Dance

Take a zumba class, a belly dance class, or just dance in your bedroom! Dancing will make you more aware of your movements, you’ll feel the flow in the music, and you’ll be able to connect to it. Move your hips with ease and grace! This will make you feel feminine in an instant!

#4. Spend time with other women

How to avoid turning into a masculine beast when weight training?Spending all that time at the gym surrounded by sweaty men and muscles can make a woman start acting like a man herself. If you are living in a man’s world, you have to become a man yourself. You need a balance: start spending time with other woman. Invite your girlfriends over, or go out for a coffee. Discuss girly topics, share your feelings, ask for advice. Your soul needs other woman in your life.

#5. Read a book

Make it a romantic book, poems, or a book about woman specific topics – anything that interest you and talks to your soul. There is nothing more pleasant to your woman than being immersed in a good book!

Interested in more tips on living a healthy life? Click here for my weekly updates>>>

Biggest secret of being fit: before and after workout nutrition

Biggest secret of being fit: before and after workout nutrition

Motivation to stay fit, , , , 
Biggest secret of being fit: before and after workout nutritionI started to workout because I wanted to lose all that fat and become fit instead of fat. You'd think that after you start to workout regularly, you are on a winning run towards fit city. Let's see what you need to eat to lose weight and become fit.

The truth is that there is a difference between losing weight and becoming fit. I wanted both: to lose weight and excess fat AND become fit.

4 steps to lose weight

The only problem was that I only knew and did the usual steps I needed to make towards losing weight and burning fat. It was good for losing weight, but it did not prepare me for what was waiting for me after I’ve hit the healthy weight range. Let me share my 4 steps of how to lose weight:

Step 1: Cut off junk food

Biggest secret of being fit: before and after workout nutritionCutting back on junk food meant skipping fast food and processed food. Junk foods include salty snacks, gum, candy, sweets, fried fast food, sugary beverages. Foods such as hamburgers, pizzas and tacos were put in a healthy food category! Am I crazy? No, I am not! I just stopped ordering or buying pizzas at fast food stands: instead I prepared them at home. I’ve changed the usual processed ingredients to healthy ones (fish, fresh vegetables, herbs and a crust made from whole-wheat flour), so a healthy home-made pizza was born!

Step 2: Eat healthy

What does eating healthy even mean? For me it means eating smart. Do I eat sweets? Yes! But instead of cupcakes and chocolate bars I eat sweet fruits, dark chocolate (containing 70% or more cocoa) or make my own quick healthy snacks (crushed banana + coconut flour + ground flax seeds). I eat more vegetables and fruits, drink plenty of water and drink green tea instead of coffee. I eat meat that is roasted in coconut oil it instead of deep frying it in a fancy coating. I try to eat fish almost every day!

Step 3: Eat less

Biggest secret of being fit: before and after workout nutrition
No more snowman cupcakes for you

Less what? Less of EVERYTHING! First I just ate less, but then I got scared that I am losing weight way too quickly in an unhealthy pace. So I started counting calories, and eating less at a caloric deficit.

Step 4: Exercise!

Regular exercise is the key. Going regularly was hard at first, but it helped me develop a core strength and losing those first pounds that was a base for further development. I could begin yoga, then switched to belly dance, and then zumba and gym with a personal trainer – and finally hit the normal weight range! To maintain my workout routine I continuously look for sources to motivate myself, have a way of keeping my exercises fun and exciting.

Started exercising pilates, yoga, belly dance, zumba, body weight exercise and finally weightlifting.

How to stop losing muscles at a healthy weight after weight loss

Yeey, I’ve lost weight and all that excess fat and finally I’ve hit the normal weight range! I am not obese nor overweight anymore! Way to go!

So now what?

Turns out I only learned how to lose weight. I had no idea how to become fit.

I figured if I continue what I do, I’ll become fit. It worked for awhile (look up noob gains for more reference), but eating less (at a caloric deficit) even when eating healthy suddenly made me lose weight and muscles! What is going on? Why am I losing my muscles instead of fat???

Should you track your macronutrients and calories?This is the point when I learned about macronutrients and that the ratio of fat/protein/carbs is important.

When I started tracking my ratio of fat/protein/carbs, I saw that I don’t eat nearly enough protein as I thought I was.

So I had to pay attention to my before and after workout nutrition as well.

When to eat: before and after workout nutrition

You want to know my secret? Timing is everything!

When to eat before a cardio workout: 2 hours before a cardio type of a workout such as zumba, belly dance, aerobics and such I eat a banana. It fuels my workout and my belly doesn’t feel bloated.

When to eat before strength training: half an hour before hitting the gym I eat a banana or drink a pre-workout shake. It fuels my muscles and I have strength to lift weights.

What to eat: before and after workout nutrition

Biggest secret of being fit: before and after workout nutrition
Nutella in a capsule before your workout for weightloss

Before workout choose one of the following:

After workout nutrition might include the following:

Before and after workout nutrition

Paying attention to what you eat before workout is important because it fuels your workout. This is especially true for weightlifting: on days I didn’t eat a banana or an apple before my workout, I felt I didn’t have enough strength and couldn’t lift much. On zumba classes I’ve became light headed if I didn’t eat 2 hours before my class. However, if I ate pasta or something else, I felt bloated and it was hard to workout.

After an intense weightlifting workout your body needs protein, so for optimal gains, you should consume fast digesting proteins before and after workout. You can build muscles faster if you give them fast-digesting protein/simple carb meals after a weightlifting session. See why you need to start lifting weights as a woman>>>

For best results, I suggest that you experiment with what you eat and when you eat it before and after your workout. To become fitter, start paying attention to your before and after workout nutrition!

Interested in more tips on living a healthy life? Click here for my weekly updates>>>

Should you track your macronutrients and calories?

Motivation to stay fit, , 
Should you track your macronutrients and calories?Have you ever wondered what macros are and what are the cases when you should be tracking your macros and calculating your calories? Find out 3 reasons why you need to track your macros and calculate calories.

The difference between macronutrients and calories

Protein, carbohydrate and fat are macronutrients or macros for short. The food you eat consists of either protein, carbohydrates or fats. Tracking macronutrients or macros is basically counting how much carbohydrates, fats and proteins you consume daily.

Calories show the amount of energy in food. If you calculate the calories that you eat per day, you’ll be able to balance the energy you put in your body with the energy that you use. This is the way towards a healthy weight. The formula is easy: if you eat/drink more calories than you burn, you’ll gain weight. If you eat less calories than you burn, you lose weight. Sounds simple? It is. However, counting calories is not easy at first.

Eating healthy without counting calories and macros?

Should you track your macronutrients and calories?
This was a healthy food choice for my Ex Fat Chick self: it has vegetables on it!

Every time I heard about clean eating, healthy foods or organic products while I was fat my head started spinning. Yes, I wanted to eat healthier, but I imagined it just meant eating veggies, fruits and dairy from a green farm with a rainbow over it. I had no idea where to find an eco-friendly farm that always has a rainbow over it. So I stuck to eating junk food and processed food, although I had no idea what processed food meant (for those of you who are still not sure, I suggest Wikipedia).

When you discuss weight loss, the first thing that is bought to your attention is that you should exercise and start calculating calories. It seemed such a big deal to start calculating calories: I needed to buy a kitchen scale, I need to write down how much of anything I ate, then add it up. Sometimes the package didn’t have any calorie info on it, or I needed to search online to see how much calories a carrot contains. It was soooo boring and time consuming that I didn’t bother with it. So to ease it up, I started exercising while I was fat, and paying attention that I eat less sweets. I substituted chocolate with a glass of milk. Instead of eating candy, I ate an orange. This is how my journey from fat to fit girl started.

How to start tracking calories

It took me years and years to get to a point where I started calculating calories and track macros. If you are starting now, and it seems so intimidating to you, but you have no idea how many calories you actually consume per day, then I have a great advice for you.

How not to freak out about losing workout routine while injured or sickStart with tracking your calories just once on one of your typical days. Track the calories in everything that you eat, drink: coffee, milk and sugar that you put in your coffee, snacks, juices, soda. Every calorie needs to be tracked, so you can see how many calories you consumed that day. I was surprised to see how much calories that one pizza slice had. Your goal here is to get a clear picture of your eating habits.

Now there are many options to make tracking calories easy for you: online calorie trackers, apps for you phone, food scanners, smart plates that recognizes the foods and calculates the calories they contain. I use MyFitnessPal, a calorie counter app.

When and why track calories and macros

Tracking calories and macros can help you achieve your weight goals. But tracking calories and counting macros is not for everyone. Let’s see the reason why you should track calories and macros and what are the cases in which you should not track calories and macros.

Why should You track calories?

  • Get a clear picture of how much you are eating
  • Helps you get rid of bad eating habits
  • Makes you able lose weight or gain weight

However, if at any point you feel like tracking calories is stressing you out or bringing back your eating disorder or obsessive behaviors or thoughts, then you should stop tracking calories and macros.

Don’t track your calories in the following cases:

  • feel like tracking calories is way too stressing
  • Your eating disorders is coming back by counting calories
  • You have obsessive thoughts or behavior
  • You just want to be healthy and don’t care about weight loss

Why should You start tracking macros?

  • To stop losing muscle instead of fat during weight loss
  • To gain muscle instead of fat
  • Want to become lean

Don’t count your macros if:

  • You just started your weight loss journey and this is your first time counting calories – It will be way to intimidating to track your macros as well, and  you’ll quit before you even seen the first results. For the time being, just concentrate on making healthy food choices and changing your bad eating habits while engaging in regular exercise activity.
  • You just want to be healthy and don’t want a bodybuilder body
  • You tracked your macros for so long that you can tell how much of a protein a bite of that chicken has

Want to start tracking your macros and calories? Start here>>>

Just remember: counting calories and meeting macros should be used to get closer to living a healthy life. If it’s putting too much stress on you in any way, then don’t do it. The important thing in live is for you to be balanced and content, and you should feel good about your healthy choices in life and not feel like you are punishing yourself.

Want more tips on living a healthy life? Click here for my weekly updates>>>

You become what you repeatedly do

FITspiration Friday

For FITspiration Friday, I bring you one thought that resonated with me this week.

If there is one sentance that can change your life, then for me this week it was this:

“We become what we repeatedly do.”

This.

When I worry about little things, I am a stressed out girl.

When I eat like crap, I feel and look like crap.

But when I:

I go to the gym to lift weights 3 times a week. I am a lifter and a squatter now.

I dance 2 times a week. I am a dancer now. I dance at parties and whenever I feel like.

I do yoga every morning. I am a modern yogi now.

So think about your habits, because they build up who you are.

Have a nice weekend!

 

 

Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit body

Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit body

Body image problems, Emotional issues after weight loss, , , , , , 
Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit bodyAfter significant weight loss, friends, coworkers and acquaintances will start noticing your new found body. They will feel like it is time for them to compliment you on your new fit body. How can you accept these compliments without being rude or seeming awkward?

People around me noticed my weight loss and positive changes about my body way sooner than I have. It was annoying for a while to address their compliments and answer their questions about my fit body, and I hated it. But looking back I see now that their comments and questions helped me a lot with my mental barriers of accepting my new fit body.

Why people compliment on your weight loss success

I bet you want to know why someone is giving you a compliment on your weight loss. If you think that the person who complimented on your looks wants something from you, you will less likely believe the compliment. All this can make you interpret the compliment in a totally different way than it was intended.

Getting fit and losing weight affects not just your looks and attitude but also the perception of how others see you. There will be a change in people’s attitudes towards the new fit you.

Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit body
“Sir, I noticed your large beer belly has vanished! You look awesome!”
Smiles: “Thank you sir for noticing my fat crying.”

Part of their changed view comes from the fact that your looks have changed, and that change in your body becomes noticeable at a first glance to others. The other reason for from the fact that it’s not just your body that changed, but your attitude as well. Your improved self confidence you’ve gained with regular workout shines through.

These are just some of the reasons why you are drawing wanted (or unwanted) attention of your friends and acquaintances. You may find this to be pleasing, and it can even give you a temporary boost in motivation to workout harder. On the other hand, if you are like me, you will find all this sudden rush of attention unwelcome and have mixed feelings about people who unexpectedly shower you with compliments, and struggle with finding the best way to deal with all that sincere or false openness.

Some people will be thrilled about your success, because you’ve accomplished what they are just hoping to achieve one day. As may it be fascinating for you at first to hear the compliments, you will grow tired of them soon after. Especially when you realize that what they say is actually a reflection of their own biases, self-doubt and flaws.

How you are currently dealing with compliments about your weight loss

Until now, you’ve dealt with compliments about your successful weight loss in one of the 3 possible ways:

  1. Rejecting the compliment
  2. Deflecting the compliment
  3. Accepting the compliment

How you are dealing with a compliment about your successful weight loss tells about you a lot.

The way you deal with compliments reflects your level of self-esteem and self-worth. [Tweet this!]

If compliments on your successful weight loss make you feel uncomfortable, it is because the compliments contradicts your own self-view.

1. Rejecting a compliment

“- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

“- No, I don’t look great.”

When it comes to compliments about your looks, an inner fat girl makes you deny that the flattery could be true.

If you have high self-esteem then you will reject the compliment because you want to be perceived as modest.

Just imagine how it feels for the other person when he or she says something nice with his or her best intentions, and you reject it. This is the worst you can do. You undermine the compliment or insult the compliment giver by rejecting a compliment about your weight loss.

2. Deflecting the compliment

There are 3 ways to deflect a compliment about your successful weight loss:

  • Self-insult:

    “- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

    “- No, I did not lose a lot of weight. My lose clothing makes me look like I’ve lost a lot of weight, but trust me, I am still fat under it.”

  • Denial:

    “- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

    “- No, I don’t. Look, I have batwings under my arms.”

  • Boomerang:

    “- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

    “- You look amazing too! Is that a new necklace you’re wearing?”

Why you are feeling awkward when accepting a compliment about your fit body
“I love your t-shirt!”
“Umm…look at this pebble.”

The problem with deflecting a compliment abut your successful weight loss is that you give the impression that you don’t respect the opinion of the person who gave you the compliment. You should return the compliment, but not right away. Say something nice about the person who gave you the compliment about your successful weight loss the next time you two meet.

3. Accepting the compliment

Your best bet is to just accept the compliment about your successful weight loss that has been given you.

“- Wow! You’ve lost a lot of weight! You look great!”

“- Thanks, that’s very kind of you!”

If you want to follow it up with an explanation of how you’ve worked hard for looking like this, feel free.

Actually, accepting a compliment about your successful weight loss is a compliment for itself. By accepting the compliment someone gave you, you are suggesting them that you trust their judgement, wisdom and opinion, and you appreciate what they have to say.

Lesson on how to accept a compliment about weight loss

Even if you don’t agree with a compliment, you should take it gracefully. Respect the compliment giver by accepting the compliment. Say this if you are accepting a compliment on your successful weight loss if you don’t agree with what the other person said about you:

  • “Thank you”, “Thank you very much”
  • “Thanks, I appreciate that.”
  • “Thanks, that’s a lovely thing to say.”
  • “Thanks, that makes me feel good.”
  • “Thanks, that means a lot to me.”
  • “Thanks, you’re very kind.”

If you agree with a compliment given to you about your successful weight loss, accept the compliment by saying the following things:

  • “Thanks. I’m really glad you noticed that I’ve lost significant weight because it’s something I’m proud of too.”
  • “Thanks! I trained really hard.”

Don’t be focused on the content of the compliment when receiving one, but rather focus on receiving the compliment. And don’t forget to smile!

Want more tips on living a healthy life? Click here for my weekly updates>>>

What can you do to stay fit if you lose your motivation?

What can you do to stay fit if you lose your motivation?

Motivation to stay fit, , , ,

What can you do to stay fit if you lose your motivation?Tips on how to motivate yourself to get fit are awesome, because they push you to make the first step towards a healthier lifestyle. However, motivation with time wears off. It is inevitable to lose your initial motivation to get fit. So what can you do to stay fit even when you’ve lost your motivation?

What can you do to get fit if you lose your motivation?

The health magazine guides suggest many creative ways to find something that will motivate you to get fit:

What can you do to stay fit if you lose your motivation?
There. Bruno follows me around, so my workout gear is in a visible place.
  • Put workout gear in a visible place
  • Buy expensive new workout wear
  • Log workouts online
  • Get a workout buddy
  • Share motivational quotes on social media
  • Follow people who inspire you

I think all this is just BrunoPoo.

If your motivation to get fit is to justify buying expensive workout wear, then I bet you’ll be skipping workouts at the end of your second week.

A workout buddy will bail on you with time, because it is impossible to synchronize your schedule with a friend in a long run.

Reading inspiring quotes and looking at pictures of fit girls won’t make you magically appear at the gym.

How to find motivation to get fit and stay fit

Whatever your initial motivation was to get fit, chances are that motivating factor is gone by now. Are you searching for long term motivation? There are only 2 things that can motivate you to make a big change and stick to it in the long run.

What are the 2 most powerful motivators to get fit and stay fit in the long run?

#1. Motivation to get fit: Fear

Fear is the most powerful motivator. Use it.

If you are afraid of having a heart attack, it’s great. That is your motivation to start living a more healthy lifestyle.

If you watched your grandmother struggle from Osteoarthritis as a result of obesity, and you fear that it runs in the family, then it’s time to use that fear as motivation.

My mother suffers from severe migraines as a result of stress, unhealthy lifestyle and lack of exercise. I couldn’t change her mind about the importance of workout, no matter how hard I tried. I didn’t wanted to end up like her, so I started doing yoga for stress relief. Started eating healthy, drinking plenty of water, getting plenty of sleep. The occurrence of my migraines dropped significantly.

One day I was walking past a school where young parents were waiting for their children. They are all younger than me, and already had children in school. I realized that I am over 30 and I still don’t have kids. If I decide to start a family of my own, I’ll be the oldest mom there waiting outside a primary elementary school to collect my child. I’ll have wrinkles, back pain and myriad health problems due to my obesity. It was then that I’ve decided that I don’t want to be that mom. I will lose the excess weight. Changed my bad habits into healthy ones. Started using sunscreen religiously.

Find what you fear the most and use it to motivate yourself towards big achievements.

#2. Motivation to stay fit: Habit

I started losing weight when I was obese because I wanted to live by leading a healthy lifestyle.

I started to work out because I was overweight and I wanted to look good for my wedding (mission accomplished).

What can you do to stay fit if you lose your motivation?
This expensive aerobic workout should be motivating enough to regularly attend the classes.

Then being able to carry all my groceries in one trip felt awesome.

Then I discovered that it’s called bodybuilding because you CAN sculpt yourself a body you want. Now I am experimenting with building myself a better booty. It never stops. Once I jumped on the fitness bandwagon and saw result, I was hooked. Working out became a habit.

When you start doing a morning sun salutation yoga stretching right after you get out of bed tricking your brain still in sleep mode unable to come up with reason why you shouldn’t do it, it becomes a habit. You just get out of bed and head to your yoga mat and start stretching. By the time your brain wakes up, your done. And you feel like you’ve already achieved something today. Habit is what keeps you going in the long run.

So your best bet to stick with your workout when your motivation is gone? Use your deepest fear as a motivator to get fit. Make workout a habit. That’s it.

One more thing: by making your workout constant, it helps you keep things in your life together. Your job is a mess, your relationship is falling apart, family is a disaster. The moment you hit the gym, all that vanishes, it’s only you and your workout.

Want to start going to the gym but you have no one to go with? Fear not! Here are 4 hacks to get you to the gym if you are afraid of going to the gym alone as a girl >>>

Build a better booty + arms workout (2+1 days)

Build a better booty + arms workout (2+1 days)

FITspiration Friday, , 
Build a better booty + arms workout (2+1 days)FITspiration Friday! Yey! Summer is approaching, and if you want a better booty and toned arms, you need to do something about it! What could you do to have Victoria's Secret models' arms and booty in a bikini? Start this 3 day workout routine! After just 1 week, I (and my husband) can see significant improvements on my booty! I can't imagine how my booty will look at the end of the 4th week!

Build a better booty + arms

2+1 days per week workout routine

Build a better booty + arms workout (2+1 days)Day 1 – Booty day

Exercise Sets Reps

1. Circuit:
Bodyweight Squat (or just Squat)
Bodyweight Glute Bridge
Lateral Lunge

 2-3 10

2. Superset:
Weighted Glute Bridge
Kettlebell Sumo Deadlift

 3 10-12

3. Superset:
Front Foot Elevated Lunge
Dumbbell Romanian Deadlift

 4 10-12

Build a better booty + arms workout (2+1 days)Day 2 – Arm toning day

Exercise Sets Reps

Close Grip Bench Press or Assisted Dips

 3 6-10

Standing Dumbbell Curl

 3 6-10

Two Arm Seated Overhead Dumbbell Extension

 3 6-10

EZ Bar Preacher Curl

 3 6-10

Build a better booty + arms workout (2+1 days)Day 3 – Booty day again

Exercise Sets Reps

1. Circuit:
Bodyweight Squat (or just Squat)
Bodyweight Glute Bridge
Lateral Lunge

 2-3 10

2. Superset:
Bodyweight Bulgarian Split Squat
Kettlebell Lateral Lunge

 3 10-12

3. Superset:
Barbell Deadlift
Lying Leg Curl

 4 10-12

Clicking on the exercise will take you to a video showing you how to perform the exercise properly. So all you need to do after watching the videos is head to the gym and start building yourself a better booty and toned arms for summer!

The Build a better booty workout program is a 2 day per week routine, but on the original website its from you can choose a 1, 2 and 3 day glutes program – based on how much time you have left until summer bikini season. If you are looking for a more intense arm toning workout, I suggest checking out Muscle & Strength.

Go on girl, head to the gym and build yourself a better booty and toned arms for summer! Jump on the bandwagon and subscribe for weekly updates by clicking here>>>

Rude remarks you'll get after you become fit that you never got while fat

Rude remarks you’ll get after you become fit that you never got while fat

Emotional issues after weight loss, , 
Rude remarks you'll get after you become fit that you never got while fatDo you get lifestyle advice based on personal opinion from people now that you are fit? Are those actually rude remarks about you being fit or advice that you would never hear if you were still fat? Learn how to respond to the rude things people tell you after you become fit that they would never tell the fat you!

Here are the most common advice people give after you become fit that they would never tell you while you were fat:

Rude remark #1: “You looked better fat…”

Do they believe that I will suddenly realize that I am way too fit (there’s no such thing) and I start shoveling in cupcakes after cupcakes until I become fatter than they are? Yes, they secretly hope so that I will. This would make them comfortable with the fact that they are overweight themselves. Let’s admit it: who wants to be reminded that their unhealthy weight surplus is something they could also work on?

People who say this believe that they are being honest and open with you. However, they would never ever say anything about you being too chubby while you were obese, because they consider it rude.

So how the heck is it acceptable in their head to comment your weight when you are fit and unacceptable to comment on your weight back when you were fat???

Obesity is okay because you can’t do anything about it, and being fit is not okay because you worked your ass and fat off for looking like this. [Tweet this!]

What they don’t know is that having a huge body is also a lot of work: you need to eat a lot of food for a lot of days to gain so much weight that will put you in the obese spectrum.

Rude remarks you'll get after you become fit that you never got while fat
“Julie, I swear you looked better while you had those excess 50 pounds!”

The hardest people are the ones who were once fit with little or no effort at all, but with aging they started to gain weight. Now they are on the edge of overweight/obese. They feel the worst when they see you, the girl formerly known as fat rocking those skinny pants and tank top. Well, heck, life is being unfair to them! You should not be looking like a 10 (see the “genetically gifted” Angels for reference) since you are now also over 30 years old. You should have more excess belly fat and a hundred of excuses of why you are not being able to lose weight and keep it off! The universe is just playing a trick on them by magically turning their forever fat friend into a Victoria’s Secret model. So they better fix this injustice by convincing you to stop. Just turn back into your normal old crappy fat self like Cinderella at the stroke of midnight. So they can go back to their everyday lives of no exercise and stop thinking about that belly fat of theirs being unhealthy.

Or you might have heard the “mild” version of it, the:

“You looked cuter when you were chubby”.

There is something seriously wrong in the head with these people if they believe that commenting on you being way too fit is appropriate, but commenting on someone’s weight if they are fat is just rude.

Choose your reaction to the rude comment wisely (depending on mood or your level of willingness to stay friends):

Response #1: If you know that you are in a healthy weight and body range, then you might as well just ignore them.

Response #2: Politely ask for their opinion of why they think that you looked better fat instead of fit. You’ll be surprised at their reaction.

Response #3: If you are really pissed off, turn into your rude Hulk self and in your most polite voice tell them:

“Well, you looked better fit/single/before having kids.”

So let’s see another good advice people will give you after you become fit that you never got while being fat.

Rude remark #2: “You got sick because you’re working out too much!”

Just screw you (excuse my language). I got sick because I’ve caught a virus from your child which he bought home from kindergarten and you’ve spread it at the office.

You injured your knee? Yeah, you should not work out that much. All that weight lifting is bad for your knees, you know. I will give you work advice I’ve heard from other fat people who occasionally visit the gym and come up with excuses why they should not make it a habit. Going to the gym 3 times a week and doing zumba as cardio is bad for you in the long run. I told you so it’s going to end badly.

Rude remarks you'll get after you become fit that you never got while fat
“So we can agree to ignore Jim here because he’ll certainly break his leg from all that rock climbing he’s been doing and miss the presentation of our project.”

These are the people who know that they should work out, and they see you do it. They are feeling bad because they don’t do it. So when an opportunity presents itself when they can blame your active, healthy lifestyle for some of the accidents or unexpected things that happen to you, they jump in. But you don’t hear them blaming fat people’s injuries and sickness for the lack of workout they are getting.

Your reaction to these comments could be that you just mention:

Response #1: “Remember that yesterday you had a headache after eating all that leftover birthday cake right after your pizza breakfast? All those carbs gave you Hyperglycemia, that’s why you’ve felt so lethargic lately.”

Response #2:  “You know how you get exhausted when the elevator is out of order and you have to use the stairs to reach the 2nd floor? That’s because you don’t work out at all.”

Did you notice that:

  • it’s always the unfit people commenting on your fit body, never the fit ones, because
  • fit people know how much effort it takes to look fit, so they appreciate the amount of work you’ve put into it and your commitment.

Don’t get discouraged by rude comments from people who are overweight themselves or not leading a healthy lifestyle. It’s their own insecurities they are projecting onto you.

Are you also pissed off because of all the rude remarks about you being fit? Share your story in the comments section below or follow my stories by subscribing to my newsletter. Click here>>>

Tone my arms workout routine

Tone my arms workout routine

FITspiration Friday, ,

Yeey, it’s FITspiration Friday! Again!

Tone my arms workout routineRemember how I shared my current workout routine for building a better booty? Well, starting this week I felt the need to shape my arms as well. I did this by adjusting my gym time from 2 to 3 times a week by adding a day where I tone my arms.

So starting this week a better booty workout routine changes to better booty plus arms workout!

Here is the 1 day Tone my arms workout I added to my 2 day Build a better booty workout:

Tone my arms workout

Exercise Sets Reps
Close Grip Bench Press or Assisted Dips 3 6-10
Standing Dumbbell Curl 3 6-10
Two Arm Seated Overhead Dumbbell Extension 3 6-10
EZ Bar Preacher Curl 3 6-10

And because it’s hard for me to remember the names of the workout or how to properly perform them, I wrote a cute cheat-sheet with stick figures performing the exercises.

How to memorize exercises in a workout routine
Stick figures toning their arms for summer

This is an easy arm toning workout that you can incorporate into your current workout routine once a week. If you are looking for a more intense arm toning workout, I suggest checking out the Muscle & Strength website.

This 1 day arm toning workout routine is what I do between the 2 days build a better booty workout routine. I felt the need to add one more day of gym time where my booty and leg muscles rest, because the built a better booty workout routine is pretty intense.

My 3-day a week gym time looks something like this:

Monday – Day 1: Build a better booty workout routine

Tuesday – Rest day

Wednesday – Day 2: Tone my arms workout routine (see above)

Thursday – Rest day

Friday – Day 3: Build a better booty workout routine

Go on girl, head to the gym and build yourself a better booty and toned arms for summer! Jump on the bandwagon and subscribe for weekly updates by clicking here>>>